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Really Struggling with life

random

I am in a real bad spot at the moment, feeling really low, things have been bad for some time. I have been fighting a problem with one of my pension schemes, which has affected me very deeply. I discovered last year, my pension was invested in the incorrect funds, the provider claims I phoned them to instruct them to move the funds, but I never gave them the instructions. I have followed it up it financial ombudsman, and they are siding with the pension scheme. Just feel like they have led me down and alley way and mugged me, and are going to get away with it legally.

Its not just this pension thing, there is are a large number of problems, that take enormous effort and time to try and deal with. Problems with house and landlord, problems with finances where everyone you speak too seems to think you have some spare funds magically appear. I am single, not on a low salary, but that is just not enough to support demands and cost for housing, running a car, food, council tax, etc.

I collected many things for years, put a huge effort in to storing them carefully. Over a year ago now, I found a couple of things that have got damaged from damp conditions. Was a massive setup, years of collecting, and care. I tried to sort through them to find out extent of the damage, and sell what was fine, but just got to the point I could'nt handle all the grief to see stuff I had collected get ruined. This is not storing stuff in a loft or garage, I stored in a spare bedroom carefully and placed in strong boxes.

I have been off work for past couple of weeks with stress. I have spoken to my gp, to get some further help for my mental health, but it is like hitting my head against a brick wall. No body seems to listen, and being an older single male, society just seems to totally dismiss my existence, except for when someone wants me to pay for something.

Tonight discovered an event I would like to go to, has sold out, its only a little thing, but when I am in a deep down spell like this, it really amplifies the whole thing. Really struggling to cling to something, but just can't find anything, and everything seems to be crumbling around me.

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi Random,

    Your post got duplicated because the website is cranky and slow and needs to be replaced. There are lots and lots of duplicate posts every day - it's NAS's problem to sort and they are well aware of it.

    I have had two cases taken to different ombudsmen. One went in my favour and the other didn't. They ultimately go on evidence but would require evidence from the pension company in a case like yours - do they have proper auditable records of phone calls and decisions? Many companies have audio tapes of all such conversations - have you asked for their evidence? Pensions are a scandal in this country - the pension companies (and their salesmen) were allowed to get away with selling schemes that had no final value at all for the contributor due to annual deductions of commission eating the contributions up year after year.

    I read back through some of your posts before I responded to this one - we have responded to each other over the last year but our contact has been sporadic so amongst the sheer number of people coming and going I hadn't really built up a coherent picture until now. It seems to me that you need help. Something in your life needs to change or else you will descend into worse chaos and confusion as time progresses. We find change hard but sometimes it is essential to step back and reexamine things to work out what on earth to do next.

    It struck me yesterday that we talk a lot about CBT and other interventions for MH issues but we almost never talk about interventions to help us with the fundamental communication issues that adults on the spectrum have. It is routine for children, who are diagnosed, to be offered speech and language therapy (SALT) but have you or I ever been offered anything like that? My local autism team have a drop-in scheme where they will help people with practical issues (form filling, general advice on benefits and employment etc) Do you have any support like that where you could ask for some concrete help with your communication or organisational skills?

Reply
  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi Random,

    Your post got duplicated because the website is cranky and slow and needs to be replaced. There are lots and lots of duplicate posts every day - it's NAS's problem to sort and they are well aware of it.

    I have had two cases taken to different ombudsmen. One went in my favour and the other didn't. They ultimately go on evidence but would require evidence from the pension company in a case like yours - do they have proper auditable records of phone calls and decisions? Many companies have audio tapes of all such conversations - have you asked for their evidence? Pensions are a scandal in this country - the pension companies (and their salesmen) were allowed to get away with selling schemes that had no final value at all for the contributor due to annual deductions of commission eating the contributions up year after year.

    I read back through some of your posts before I responded to this one - we have responded to each other over the last year but our contact has been sporadic so amongst the sheer number of people coming and going I hadn't really built up a coherent picture until now. It seems to me that you need help. Something in your life needs to change or else you will descend into worse chaos and confusion as time progresses. We find change hard but sometimes it is essential to step back and reexamine things to work out what on earth to do next.

    It struck me yesterday that we talk a lot about CBT and other interventions for MH issues but we almost never talk about interventions to help us with the fundamental communication issues that adults on the spectrum have. It is routine for children, who are diagnosed, to be offered speech and language therapy (SALT) but have you or I ever been offered anything like that? My local autism team have a drop-in scheme where they will help people with practical issues (form filling, general advice on benefits and employment etc) Do you have any support like that where you could ask for some concrete help with your communication or organisational skills?

Children
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