Sorry for the ramble in advance. I've felt desperate for quite a while now with the way my life is now.
I got a diagnosis of Asperger's while I was still at school and I was quite well supported until I was 18. After that I feel like I was abandoned. (ASD doesn't disappear when you turn 18!)
Since then things have generally been awful. I've had a few admissions to psych hospitals, stayed in bad supported living for a while and ended up having to move out to rented accommodation.
I feel so completely isolated and unsupported. There's nobody I could call my friend any more and my family are no help (just another source of stress). I have a social worker who is incredibly unhelpful and I'm not sure if she's aware I exist. When I have seen her I end up feeling worse afterwards. I have a psychiatrist who wants to discharge me soon and sees me for about 10 minutes every three or four months. I started a different antidepressant a few weeks ago and aside from the physical side effects (including feeling like my heart's beating really fast sometimes) I started feeling intensely suicidal for a while. That seems to have mostly worn off though.
Everything is so, so stressful. My partner's had a benefits application for over a year now and I have to be included in the application. We're also on a council housing list but meanwhile staying in a rental with a terrible landlord and loads of problems. It looks like we won't get anywhere to stay before the tenancy is up and I can't think about having to move to another awful rental place without feeling panic and dread. I find it difficult to leave the house. And the house is a tip.
I can't see much hope in the future. I don't think I can go on like this with no help, no support, massive financial worry and having to move from one terrible flat to the next.
I've tried to phone different charities etc. for advice but that in itself is incredibly difficult. There's a local charity here that could offer some kind of support but I'm on a waiting list.
I really don't know what to do and I feel like I might break soon.
Does anyone have any suggestions?