The struggle with Autism

I have an idea of how you can deal with your Grandsons behaviour when he is waiting to go into preschool. He could take a small toy with him so he has something to focus on. It can be extremely overwhelming to be in a crowd even if all of the children are lined up.  It can be very hard for someone with Autism to understand what is going on.  In terms of the hat and scarf if you have a hat and scarf you can show him that it is o.k by putting them on in front of him.  The idea of if it is o.k for me to wear a hat it will be o.k for you too.  The reason that he may want rice pudding after every meal could be that once or twice he had it after a meal.  When i was a little girl my Mum always told me to go to the loo before we went anywhere.  Even though i am 26 i still make sure i go to the toilet before i go out( to my Mums annoyance!)  So i do not know what advice i can give you for this one.

I hope this helps.

Hi Everyone!

Thank you so much for replying back to me.  I cried when i read all of the comments as i was just so overwhelmed with the supportive words.  It has been really nice to finally talk about and relate to others that have Autism.  I was having a down day yesterday and it is those days where i forget about how much that i have compared to a lot of people.

I have been considering other forms of teaching as i teach art in the FE sector.  It is hard to teach sudents who do not want to be there.  I have also had to deal with students that answer back.  I dealt with it but it was not easy.  I dont want to be in a position where i am stressed or upset due to an abusive student.  At the end of the day its just not worth it. 

I have enjoyed working with students that have a learning or physical disibility.  And i have also realised that i have much more patients and understanding for others than i thought i had.  I will stick with it and give it a good year and then decide. 

I will have to stop typing now as my giant bunny rabbits are jumping all over my bed! 

Thank you so much for all of your supportive words. 

I usually avoid the subject line because it renames the thread, but I thought that I'd get your attention this way! Sorry to be so long coming back to you, my day took me in an AS direction...

It's really difficult to find people to talk with. It isn't as if dealing with NTs is easy, they don't understand our concepts, our language, our character, any more than we understand the unsanity of their existence. It's like being a molecule of existence that's too large to pass through the osmotic barrier of communication, so we seem to end up shouting at a distance and talking in chinese whispers, barely understanding each other beyond a basic level.

It's entirely isolating. There's nothing as lonely as being alone in a crowd.

This was pretty much the first website that I found after my diagnosis. I was confused, frightened, bewildered and lost, I didn't understand the first thing about who I was, and I had no-one to talk to about it. I had no chance of believing that anyone could possibly understand me - life had taught me that one, in spades.

Then, I found myself reading the exchanges between people already here, and I got it! I actualy understood what people were saying, and even felt that it was OK to express myself in my way, and I wasn't going to get beaten for it, berated, have the pi*s taken, or anything - I was overwhelmed.

Since then, I've talked a lot, I think that there are some people who are glad that I'm here, I'm certainly glad that they are, and I feel comfortable in a way that I've never, ever in my life felt before. At first, I cried a lot just with happiness, still do occasionaly.

I'm incredibly lucky. I'm intelligent, quite learned, and very good at English. This means that I've not only been able to describe things that are my AS experience, but my family here understand what I'm saying and validate me as a human being by agreeing with me! So often I say, and see, Me Too - it's sometimes like a shout of triumph.

We express a wide variety of views, sometimes we agree, sometimes we disagree, but no-one's opinion is unwelcome and can even give me food for thought. I've changed my views, opinions and attitudes by taking in what people say and then thinking about it, and I'm very grateful to everyone for the wide open debate that goes on here.

I'm so glad you've joined us, we AS people are few, and we need to stick together. The NAS isn't great, there's a lot we'd like to change, but that isn't anywhere near as important to my wellbeing as being amongst my own kind on this discussion forum.

And the job you do? So what? As Longman says, we don't give proper ecognition to those people who make our life so good. Imagine the foulness we'd live in were it not for the hard work of Refuse Collectors. What would we drink if Water workers didn't supply our clean, disease-free water? And how could I enjoy a meal out if someone hadn't ensured that my food was hygenicaly produced and served on a clean plate?

Sometimes I give support, sometimes I need it, and sometimes I get to say to someone, Me Too!

My advice Peafowl? Talk to us, you've found your community! Welcome to the family

Hi Peafowl,

Work in education needs to carry a Government Health Warning. Pretty well everyone is stressed. But it is majorly so if you are on the spectrum, for precisely the reasons you've hinted at - collegiate expectations.

My background is higher education, but this collegiate nonsense is much the same in different ways perhaps. You are expected to present an image to your students,in keping with some kind of ethos of all-knowing authority. All students are idiots unless proved otherwise, never show weakness in front of a student etc etc.

To be honest I think the NTs that carry on like this greatly add to their own stress and are bad teachers. Good teachers are the ones who relate to their students, allow some give and take within reason, and avoid the rabble gaining control by working hard on their lesson plan so they really enthuse and inspire. The phoney authority types are often the teachers who have to stop all the time to discipline noisy students who are just bored with their bad teaching. They are the ones who think humiliating weaker students is cool.

That said it is hard to deal with a noisy class with autistic spectrum, not being able to think clearly, not being able to work out when a student is being constructive or disruptive, and you are bound to show weakness. I just think that teachers on the spectrum can and do make good teachers.

I also think you can strengthen your position by taking on neglected areas like disabled or disadvantaged. And your experience of cleaning - cleaning is a badly underrated profession, where would we be without cleaners? And cleaning is an environmentally perceptive profession. You can make cleaning seem really up beat. Same with 'dustmen' - everybody scorns the job but it is an essential service and worthy of better language used to describe it.

To Nanny ju, could you ask the Mods to make you a new thread. I know it is difficult to start new topics because the software hiccups and Bob cannot fix it. But coming onto an existing thread with something entirely different is a disservice to the original poster.

I find when posting a new topic, when it sits for ages and comes up with a server error, I just click on Discussion Forum (top left hand margin - you may have to scroll up a bit) and it accepts it as a new topic. We shouldn't have to do this but we don't seem to have the IT support we need on a site like this. IT is very taken up with checking out our language.

Look forward!

Hi Peafowl, welcome to the family.

I was just going offline when I saw your post, so just had to say hi. I'm usually one for long posts, but my magazine has just dropped through the letterbox, so please excuse this short message. Talk later.

You've come to the right place, you are not alone any more

Hi 

following  from my concerns with my grandson, this week we have a few new behaviour. Waiting to go into preschool,in a busy waiting area, he slapped 2 boys and then shook hand with an other saying how do you do?

We now have to wait and go in when everyone has gone.

He wants rice pudding and jam after every meal,he now gets upset until you put it in a special bowl and stir the jam in.

He has been running from one window to the other shouting help,and will not wear any hat scarf gloves.

We are advised not to take him to town has he freaks out.

 Amy comments welcome please read my privious.

Help needed

Thanks