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Cyberbullying

Disordergirl

On Facebook on a post about autism and how it doesn't need to be cured and it makes autistic individuals who they are, which I believe is very true and 74 people liked my comment. So I commented and stated saying I need to be cured makes me a second class citizen and that aspergers makes who I am and has helped me throughout life and that we should end discrimination. This guy replied and said I was wrong it doesn't make me who I am and that it is just a deficit on social interaction that needs to be cured, dunno where he got that information from because it's different from what I was told by every professional I've met; he also said that saying it makes me who I am makes me egotistical. So I disagreed reasonably and said that I had therapy and am at uni and why do I need a pill when I have strategies and that it's more complex than he thinks, then another women agreed with me. Then he stated that unless you wanna be homeless and not speak then anyone would want a pill, then he said maybe I had that to the woman, talking about me like a science experiment. Because I hate language like that I blocked him (I wasn't friends with him anyway) and I didn't want to get in a bottomless debate as I was working and those sorts of things are too much for me. Then he commented again as he wasn't completely blocked and said "right" to start with, then he said he was starting to take my side but then after he found I blocked him said I was egotistical and socially stupid yada yada yada (bullying language), so I reported him for harassing me, then I typed out a message saying I was scared, he's egotistical too and it wasn't typed properly but I tried to say he was saying something different from most professionals I know said, it wasn't gramatically correct as I was literally shaking. This was in a uni library too, so I sobbed and a kind guy offered (still have some faith in humanity), then I retreated for a bit not reading his following comments, but I read his last comment saying block this account if it makes you feel better, I wouldn't want to get in the way of your therapy (despite the fact that was doing a dissertation, not therapy at the time). But I wonder where he pulled this simple deficit idea from. I'm glad I blocked him and I can no longer see his comments and I'm glad I put myself out there as my comment got the most likes, I dunno what the reply where it all happened looks like now for those who haven't blocked him and a nice looking girl replied later who was on the mildly on spectrum said she agreed and told me about herself and how she's loves learning and is highly logical, which made me feel better. I respect everybody has an opinion, but bottomless facebook debates can get too much at times and go no where and freedom of speech doesn't permit people to bully, especially vunerable people. I don't know if I shouldn't had replied or had blocked him later, but I just have so much anger the way people on the spectrum are seen and spoken about, I hate people that talk about us who don't get the social model of disability, that I emotionally blocked him at that point. What should I do next time, was he just an attention seeking troll? 

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  • Hey Steven

    Sorry I replied late, I've been a bit stressed with my dissertation lately. Hope you're doing OK. Yeah I've balanced it all out in my head, next time I'm just not gonna reply to some ignorant troll looking for an arguement and to lower self esteem.

    Yes I do believe sociology has allowed me to understand NT behaviour, I study it at uni and I actually feel my Aspergers has helped me study it, because I've always felt like an outsider looking in, at A level we were told before doing sociology that we had to see society from an alien's point of view, which might have been easier for me, than an NT. I'm not sure if anyone else feels like that, but that's how I felt. My dissertation is on Aspergers and social support. It's interesting to look at the condition with social theory. I have a friend with Aspergers who does a psychology degree nd she loves it, she's made it her special interest. In relation to her Aspergers, she sees the discipline simular to the way I see sociology. I've never studied psychology myself at A level, but my friend on the spectrum loves it so I say if you like, give it a bash!!!! 

    Yeah, those that see Aspergers as a disease really have no understnding of what it really is, I always ignore that. Yeah I agree, there's many aspects of NTs that need curing, dangerous driving is definately one of them, I don't drive, but I remember once in my aunt's car this driver was going way too fast to ovetake everyone in the Dartford tunnel and he drive so close to the side of our car, my aunt was terriffied and so was I, even as a passanger! It's not surprising there are so many road deaths every year. I'm sorry you've had to deal with bad drivers for some time, it must have been difficult. I think speeding definately needs a cure!

    Yeah I agree with you on the fact that people can only understand autism and aspergers if they've been taught it longer in school. Maybe it could be part of a disabilities curriculum or it could be taught across all subjects and maybe they should introduce sociology and psychology in high school, it may get more people to understand society more and will be a way teaching about autism and other conditions that are widely misunderstood. Getting people to understand is very difficult, definately.

    Yeah I find many NTs really want to maintain good or stand-out impressions, but they always overdo it. It's all about commodifiaction in today's society. As you say just going to the gym does not automatically make someone stronger and better, you have to actually enjoy and be good at the things there. I did a seminar reading on gym membership, it's interesting, it's not just excercise anymore, it's a cult and commodity really. Same with so many other things, like fashion and technology.

    There is something in the whole money v happiness thing. Maybe because people on the spectrum see things as they are, money and branding becomes insignificant.

    I think the medical model of disability still filters down to the public's view on disability too much, whether it's mental, physical or learning. The social model arguing society creates disability by societal norms, so it's difficult to change public opinion. After I graduate, I might try & contribute to public autism understanding

    Thanks for your insights Steven and I'm willing to learn more from others too

    Phoebe Smile 

Reply

  • Hey Steven

    Sorry I replied late, I've been a bit stressed with my dissertation lately. Hope you're doing OK. Yeah I've balanced it all out in my head, next time I'm just not gonna reply to some ignorant troll looking for an arguement and to lower self esteem.

    Yes I do believe sociology has allowed me to understand NT behaviour, I study it at uni and I actually feel my Aspergers has helped me study it, because I've always felt like an outsider looking in, at A level we were told before doing sociology that we had to see society from an alien's point of view, which might have been easier for me, than an NT. I'm not sure if anyone else feels like that, but that's how I felt. My dissertation is on Aspergers and social support. It's interesting to look at the condition with social theory. I have a friend with Aspergers who does a psychology degree nd she loves it, she's made it her special interest. In relation to her Aspergers, she sees the discipline simular to the way I see sociology. I've never studied psychology myself at A level, but my friend on the spectrum loves it so I say if you like, give it a bash!!!! 

    Yeah, those that see Aspergers as a disease really have no understnding of what it really is, I always ignore that. Yeah I agree, there's many aspects of NTs that need curing, dangerous driving is definately one of them, I don't drive, but I remember once in my aunt's car this driver was going way too fast to ovetake everyone in the Dartford tunnel and he drive so close to the side of our car, my aunt was terriffied and so was I, even as a passanger! It's not surprising there are so many road deaths every year. I'm sorry you've had to deal with bad drivers for some time, it must have been difficult. I think speeding definately needs a cure!

    Yeah I agree with you on the fact that people can only understand autism and aspergers if they've been taught it longer in school. Maybe it could be part of a disabilities curriculum or it could be taught across all subjects and maybe they should introduce sociology and psychology in high school, it may get more people to understand society more and will be a way teaching about autism and other conditions that are widely misunderstood. Getting people to understand is very difficult, definately.

    Yeah I find many NTs really want to maintain good or stand-out impressions, but they always overdo it. It's all about commodifiaction in today's society. As you say just going to the gym does not automatically make someone stronger and better, you have to actually enjoy and be good at the things there. I did a seminar reading on gym membership, it's interesting, it's not just excercise anymore, it's a cult and commodity really. Same with so many other things, like fashion and technology.

    There is something in the whole money v happiness thing. Maybe because people on the spectrum see things as they are, money and branding becomes insignificant.

    I think the medical model of disability still filters down to the public's view on disability too much, whether it's mental, physical or learning. The social model arguing society creates disability by societal norms, so it's difficult to change public opinion. After I graduate, I might try & contribute to public autism understanding

    Thanks for your insights Steven and I'm willing to learn more from others too

    Phoebe Smile 

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