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Not sure how to take a joke

Hope

Today my  therapist joked at me. I was talking to her about a previous obsession with the actress Kate Winslet and how unfortunately I could not study Winslet at University or I would have done this instead of my History degree. The therapist then said, 'oh, I am sure you can study her these days, there are courses that exist where you can study Winslet'. I thought this was a bit strange, but I believed what she said because I had no reason to believe she was not stating a fact. She did laugh as she said it, bit it was not obvious to me that this was a joke until she said, 'no, I was joking, you cannot study Winslet'.

I feel unsettled and anxious by the fact my therapist told a joke, and I don't know whether she was being nice or whether she was trying to test my reaction? She knows I am autistic, and in fact she specialises in autism.

Should I let her know that these sort of jokes irritate me? The problem is that I am not sure why it bothers me so much and I do not want to be seen as someone without a sense of humour, but I do not understand why people need to 'joke' like this - I did not think it was funny so what was the point?

Parents

  • Humour is a tricky area. It is likely with autism that you cannot read the body language and facial expressions used to supplement the intended humour in the words, or used differently in order to mislead, in sarcasm. Nor can you be expected to show the right facial expressions in response.

    I suspect that the therapist let it slip her mind that you might not understand. Hopefully she will have registered from your reaction that she needs to be more careful with jokes in future. 

    I'm sure somewhere there is a course on some aspect of Kate Winslet's acting in media studies. What I think she meant is that you can study anything in university. The joke used to be degrees in one sport eg football. So it was a joke, but one that the therapist should have considered how she presented it to someone with autism.

    You shouldn't have to explain your difficulty to your therapist; she should understand, and should endeavour not to repeat it, if she is professional. If she does do it again, however, you would be perfectly entitled to explain to her that you are at a disadvantage in recognising humour and that she ought to consider this.

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  • Humour is a tricky area. It is likely with autism that you cannot read the body language and facial expressions used to supplement the intended humour in the words, or used differently in order to mislead, in sarcasm. Nor can you be expected to show the right facial expressions in response.

    I suspect that the therapist let it slip her mind that you might not understand. Hopefully she will have registered from your reaction that she needs to be more careful with jokes in future. 

    I'm sure somewhere there is a course on some aspect of Kate Winslet's acting in media studies. What I think she meant is that you can study anything in university. The joke used to be degrees in one sport eg football. So it was a joke, but one that the therapist should have considered how she presented it to someone with autism.

    You shouldn't have to explain your difficulty to your therapist; she should understand, and should endeavour not to repeat it, if she is professional. If she does do it again, however, you would be perfectly entitled to explain to her that you are at a disadvantage in recognising humour and that she ought to consider this.

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