Does Christmas affect your mental health badly?

If this time of year sends you into a downward spiral, as it does me, are there ways that you have learnt to cope with it?

As always, I find myself thinking about it much earlier than I would like to because of the stuff in the shops everywhere and of course, threads on this forum.

Some aspects of Christmas that get me down (and some that no longer apply so much).

1.  I am not Christian and as such, I don't see any meaning in it or a reason to celebrate it.

2.  The obligation to buy presents when you have little money is very deeply anxiety inducing.

3.  The obligation to spend time with people you may not even like is also deeply anxiety inducing.

4.  The obligation to be in noisy environments (see above for what it does).

5.  The expectation that you will enjoy it.

6.  The loneliness and isolation it can accentuate if you are obliged to spend it alone.

Add onto the above that Christmas was a terrible time when I was younger (especially as a child when I had to live with my parents) as my mother went into a deep depression every year and there were flaming rows at home.  It was a deeply miserable time and the onset of the 'season' is a trigger for all that unhappiness.

People say that Christmas is 'for' children but what if you never had children or a good childhood?

Obligations are every present.

Can you break with the obligations - yes but there may well be repercussions from other people.

I never really properly managed to draw back from entertaining or being entertained until various members of my family passed away.

I still have a couple of small Christmas traditions with my husband and friends.

I'm thinking this year of trying to pretend it's not happening and just doing the bare minimum including giving away my Christmas decorations which I mainly just put out because of obligation (again).

Any thoughts on how we can take back control of this time of year if we dislike/hate it?

Any thoughts on how we can make it more meaningful (pagans welcome)?

Parents
  • Yes to most of the above.

    There are 12 days in Christmas and none of them are in October or November, but unfortunately no one told our economy that.  I hate Christmas precisely because it has been so commercialised that there is no spirituality left in it.  It's just an orgy of capitalism.

    The world almost DEMANDS that we spend money we may not have doing things we don't feel like doing and woe betide us if we look anything other than extatically happy about it because a tone of social disapproval will descend upon us.

    There are all sorts of Autistic social and sensory reasons why I give it a wide berth, but the thing I hate the most is that we tell children that if they are "good" Santa will being them what they want.  Meanwhile, many "good" children will go without because their parents can't afford it, or will go into debt until June trying to do it "for the children".

    Christmas should be deeply spiritual for those who have that belief.  Instead it has become deeply socially unjust.

    As a kid, I enjoyed it until the day aged 10 the other children made fun of me in the play ground for believing in Santa.  I had staunchly defended him stating our parents couldn't afford all those toys, so he had to be real.  I went home and challenged my mother on the point.  She had no option but to tell me the truth.  I was furious that she had lied to me for 10 years and had continued to withhold the truth such that it fed the bullies in the playground.

    Ban Santa, let the Christians go back to church for a few cheery carols if they want and leave the rest of us out of this misery, I say.

  • Ban Santa, let the Christians go back to church for a few cheery carols if they want and leave the rest of us out of this misery, I say.

    I will drink to that!

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