Does Christmas affect your mental health badly?

If this time of year sends you into a downward spiral, as it does me, are there ways that you have learnt to cope with it?

As always, I find myself thinking about it much earlier than I would like to because of the stuff in the shops everywhere and of course, threads on this forum.

Some aspects of Christmas that get me down (and some that no longer apply so much).

1.  I am not Christian and as such, I don't see any meaning in it or a reason to celebrate it.

2.  The obligation to buy presents when you have little money is very deeply anxiety inducing.

3.  The obligation to spend time with people you may not even like is also deeply anxiety inducing.

4.  The obligation to be in noisy environments (see above for what it does).

5.  The expectation that you will enjoy it.

6.  The loneliness and isolation it can accentuate if you are obliged to spend it alone.

Add onto the above that Christmas was a terrible time when I was younger (especially as a child when I had to live with my parents) as my mother went into a deep depression every year and there were flaming rows at home.  It was a deeply miserable time and the onset of the 'season' is a trigger for all that unhappiness.

People say that Christmas is 'for' children but what if you never had children or a good childhood?

Obligations are every present.

Can you break with the obligations - yes but there may well be repercussions from other people.

I never really properly managed to draw back from entertaining or being entertained until various members of my family passed away.

I still have a couple of small Christmas traditions with my husband and friends.

I'm thinking this year of trying to pretend it's not happening and just doing the bare minimum including giving away my Christmas decorations which I mainly just put out because of obligation (again).

Any thoughts on how we can take back control of this time of year if we dislike/hate it?

Any thoughts on how we can make it more meaningful (pagans welcome)?

Parents
  • Like you,  , I don't celebrate Christmas as such. I find the Winter Solstice more meaningful, because who doesn't like the idea of days starting to get longer?

    We do put up a few decorations in the hallway and kitchen, but nothing fancy and definitely nothing live or electric.

    In lieu of presents, we make a donation to homeless charities, so that folks who'd be out on the street at Christmas get a chance to be warm and cheerful.

    We have a family meal together on the Solstice, just four of us, then relax on Christmas Day.

    When I was little, we'd have to occasionally host extended family or go around to our uncles / aunts — that was always a bit weird as we rarely saw them the rest of the year, and didn't really know them that well. Thankfully that's no longer a thing.

    I totally get the stress of gift-buying! Particularly with the relentless advertising on TV and radio reminding you. Martin Lewis summed up why buying Christmas presents solely from perceived obligation is such a bad thing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIXFSnNe_wQ — still good advice.

  • Thank you for sharing that video although he does start off with the words:

    'Christmas is meant to be a joyous time'.

    Therein lies the problem...

Reply Children
No Data