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How do you cope?

ChrisRuthPeggy
Alexa kindly suggested starting a thread on coping techniques giving loads of tips and advice.  This is what I posted:

"Anyway, what I want to ask is for information and direction in how to cope with certain situations, activities and such.  Everyday things are challenging - shopping, housework, disorganisation and 'losing' things are a nightmare.  I don't know how to 'join in' on conversations - unable to express myself and, as such often saying the 'wrong' thing; topics of no interest to me ... The thing is that others don't understand how my mind works but, equally I don't understand how other peoples minds work.  Things that make total sense to me leave others confused and things that make total sense to others leave me confused!

I'm a research addict (comes with the territory) and have found some great resources.  I was wondering whether, if it's allowed, I could post some of the things I have found useful which may help others.  Some YouTube stuff and at least one book.  I would be so grateful if anyone could give me some advice on coping."

I've added something I sent to the AuDHD team:

"Living with AuDHD is certainly not easy, but maybe even harder for those around us as they face trying to understand our quirky behaviour!
Since receiving an explanation (through diagnosis) somehow many things now make more sense.  Ooo, people with AuDHD never make any sense (hehe!!)
As I mentioned, my thirst for knowledge drives me into a research frenzy - comes with the territory!  So, I'm sending these links which, as I've found informative, may help others (skip through the ads).  It's so difficult and I would be so grateful to hear how other people manage.
Odd Things Autistic People Do That Others Don't (Top 10)
Autism and ADHD: How to Cope With a Dual Diagnosis | Siri Nelson | TEDxUAlberta
I've also found a book (well, I'll hunt for it as it must be lying around somewhere in the disorganisation of an ADHD household!) : Found it!! "Order from Chaos - the everyday grind of staying organized with Adult ADHD" by Jaclyn Paul which I've been drawing on for tips and tricks to make life easier (and less chaotic).  There's some good stuff in there and I'd highly recommend it.
I would very much benefit from some sort of on-line group (perhaps restricted Facebook or Telegram group) where we 'neurodiverse' people can share stuff - both the sad, good and things that make us giggle!"
So here I am, joining an on-line group - wow!!
Amongst the chaos this is something I turn to (as well as gardening) when the world becomes too much: Hilarious Jack Russell Goes Crazy with Excitement at Crufts 2017!
Thanks

Parents

  • Glad your diagnosis has helped you make sense of many things. I can identify with that.

    I love researching online too, but not always for things to do with autism or ADHD. I watch YouTube occasionally, but I find the advertisements are too much 'in my face' and much prefer written information as I can control the speed and content of the details.

  • in reply to ChrisRuthPeggy

    Paranoia setting in!!!  Hoping for a response - life fascinates (and scares) me.  I love gardening, I'm not great at it, but it's my place to escape, so I spend a lot of time researching plants, garden designs and the like.  I've just started (at 65!) to try and learn how to play the guitar - hmm, difficult with AuDHD, but it takes me away from things (music is a great coping and motivating thing).  Psychology, philosophy and research methodology are probably my greatest passion.  I do use the Internet a lot for ideas ("images of ...").  I also watch YouTube stuff (yeh, the adverts can be a nuisance, but some of them are interesting, particularly those that appear when I'm doing Solitaire).  I'm constantly looking for ideas.  Sometimes when I feel low I call on YouTube for something to cheer me up - animals doing funny things (although a lot of the videos are a bit naff).  I've recently started watching those Talent YouTubes, only those that show how amazing people are.

    What I'm not interested in is politics, sport and gossip!!

    The therapist I see says I need to find "like minded people" - hmm, surely there must be someone out there?!!!

    Hope you respond X

  • in reply to ChrisRuthPeggy
    ChrisRuthPeggy said:
    My degree is in Applied Social Sciences with Criminology

    Oh, criminology! Fascinating. Decent true-life crime and fictional TV crime remain a favourite of mine. I like the psychology. I even wrote some fantasy crime and found I became increasingly interested in what drove my villains. My own degree was in psych, politics and identity politics (sex, racial and disability identity). I took the remote learning route as I don't cope well in exteneded classroom settings. How did you cope with a campus? And how did you find autism gave you insights other students couldn't access?

    ChrisRuthPeggy said:
    I finished it with "most people have more than the average number of legs"

    That's fun. I loved the OU's example of a correlation between a rise in colon cancer with the installation of telephone boxes in Britain. 

  • in reply to Alexa

    My degree is in Applied Social Sciences with Criminology as an additional option.  Fascinating!  Due to circumstances I was 45 when I started and, hence, 48 when I graduated.  In a sense life experiences, combined with the Autism (fanatical studying), helped me by gaining a different insight into the subjects than other students.

    I also question research, most of which they cite in the media is crap!  100% of people agree/find this product beneficial - how many people took part in the study?  If it was only one (and being paid to say the product is fab), then that means that 100% agreed!

    I did a presentation (yeh, scary with Autism) on 'how misleading statistics can be' for my degree.  I finished it with "most people have more than the average number of legs" - raised questions and a bit of a giggle!  You'll get it!

    "agnostic" of course, simply based on that we 'don't know'; but science is equally questionable.  My hubs asked "what was there before God?", the response I got from a devoted Christian was "well, what was there before the Big Bang?"  Pause for thought?!!  Again we don't know.  Can it all be a 'coincidence' that all these factors combined to explain how life developed on Earth - we don't know!!  We can send rockets to the moon, yet not access the deepest of our seas...

    Ooo, my brain is hurting!!

    The Greeks don't recognise the Greek (southern part) of Cyprus as Greek.  Northern Cyprus is, although not officially, politically linked with Turkey; the south is linked with Greece. Cyprus is situated in an extremely strategic position regarding what's going on between the East and the West.

    Phew!!

    XXX

Reply
  • in reply to Alexa

    My degree is in Applied Social Sciences with Criminology as an additional option.  Fascinating!  Due to circumstances I was 45 when I started and, hence, 48 when I graduated.  In a sense life experiences, combined with the Autism (fanatical studying), helped me by gaining a different insight into the subjects than other students.

    I also question research, most of which they cite in the media is crap!  100% of people agree/find this product beneficial - how many people took part in the study?  If it was only one (and being paid to say the product is fab), then that means that 100% agreed!

    I did a presentation (yeh, scary with Autism) on 'how misleading statistics can be' for my degree.  I finished it with "most people have more than the average number of legs" - raised questions and a bit of a giggle!  You'll get it!

    "agnostic" of course, simply based on that we 'don't know'; but science is equally questionable.  My hubs asked "what was there before God?", the response I got from a devoted Christian was "well, what was there before the Big Bang?"  Pause for thought?!!  Again we don't know.  Can it all be a 'coincidence' that all these factors combined to explain how life developed on Earth - we don't know!!  We can send rockets to the moon, yet not access the deepest of our seas...

    Ooo, my brain is hurting!!

    The Greeks don't recognise the Greek (southern part) of Cyprus as Greek.  Northern Cyprus is, although not officially, politically linked with Turkey; the south is linked with Greece. Cyprus is situated in an extremely strategic position regarding what's going on between the East and the West.

    Phew!!

    XXX

Children
  • in reply to ChrisRuthPeggy
    ChrisRuthPeggy said:
    My degree is in Applied Social Sciences with Criminology

    Oh, criminology! Fascinating. Decent true-life crime and fictional TV crime remain a favourite of mine. I like the psychology. I even wrote some fantasy crime and found I became increasingly interested in what drove my villains. My own degree was in psych, politics and identity politics (sex, racial and disability identity). I took the remote learning route as I don't cope well in exteneded classroom settings. How did you cope with a campus? And how did you find autism gave you insights other students couldn't access?

    ChrisRuthPeggy said:
    I finished it with "most people have more than the average number of legs"

    That's fun. I loved the OU's example of a correlation between a rise in colon cancer with the installation of telephone boxes in Britain.