After being unemployed since June (due to a walk-out meltdown), I started my new job this week, and in all honesty I HATE being back at work (then again, who does?)
I'm really struggling with it after only four days. At 36, I've recently been diagnosed with autism and I'm finding the whole experience quite overwhelming.
I think part of the problem is that there's so much to learn, and I'm already feeling like I'm not capable of doing the job. There are lots of figures, costs and information to take in, and I'm struggling to understand what everything means and how to explain it to other people. I find it difficult to process everything when there's so much information being thrown at me.
Something else that's really knocked my confidence is being asked to put together a presentation. This wasn't something I expected from the job description, and I've found the whole process incredibly difficult. It's not just about creating slides; it's about understanding the information, remembering the figures and then being able to explain everything clearly to other people. The thought of having to present makes me extremely anxious.
I'm now questioning whether I'm even the right person for this job, and I feel awful because I've barely been there a week. I know it's early days, and people keep saying that it takes time to learn a new role, but I'm finding it hard not to feel like I've made a mistake.
I don't want to give up on a job before I've had a proper chance, but I also don't want to spend every day feeling anxious and overwhelmed. I'm worried that things won't get easier, and I'm finding it difficult to tell the difference between normal nerves when starting a new job and struggling because the role might not suit me.
Has anyone else experienced anything similar when starting a new job after being diagnosed with autism? Did things get easier with time, or did you eventually realise that the role wasn't right for you?
I'd really appreciate hearing about other people's experiences, as I'm feeling quite lost at the moment and could do with some reassurance or advice from people who understand.