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General consensus from the other level 2 people or having high alexithimia do you have bad self esteem as well, or is it just me

citroen71

I notice that I just dont have much trust in myself as a human, and I have really low self esteem because of it, its like I dont feel I know what’s going on in the world, like I just dont get what the right thing is to say or do, I dont trust my own words and I have to ask my family for help to sound out my emotions 

I struggle to know what I want to do and have my own feelings, without having a melt down, im generally okay most of the time as long as the task or my job is repetitive I stay in my hula hoop , but if I have to do something new or think for my self or problem solve my brain just melts down, I was wondering if this is just me or is it common for this to happen to other level2 autistics 

to those of you who are older and have the same problems as me did it ever get better or was it just a part of you that you had to just live with, id appreciate any insights I just came to the realisation of what was causing it for me , and im not sure if its a personality issue caused by somthing else or it is just a common thing for people with this type of autism 

Parents

  • I was a moderate needs level (level 2) in sensory, ritual, compulsions and some other areas in communication and social interaction was scored moderate like conversation. These needs can lead to overwhelming more easily  and when this happens it can affect my self esteem. I am going through something like this now. At times it is like a rug can be pulled underneath me.

    I have other conditions in my life to a long term eating disorder, mostly anorexia. This has put me behind as well, but I come to terms with it.

    My self esteem is ok apart from this. I don’t have social relationships in the real life other than a place of worship I go to weekly. I work voluntary once a week and I guess that is good for me to seeing others. I try and see family when I can at family events.

    I am not very good with emotions and was not very emotional as a child. I guess not seeing people very often it doesn't feature much in my life.

  • in reply to RachelO

    thank you for being open it can be hard being open about the things that make our lives difficult, I hope you get in the positive side of the low mood soon, 

    I can relate to the rug being pulled and feeling like your self esteem went with it, the things that are new or mentally straining really make me feel bad when I realise I dont understand it or I cant trust my instincts in life on what I need to do,

    especially if im at work, like if I have my routine and its being changed and now I have to make a whole new plan on somthing I dont understand in the moment, or if im around people who understand the job, and changes to it quicker than me, when ive been doing it longer dont help, im a trying not to let people see or know that I dont understand it because I dont want people to see that im struggling 

    as long as you feel like your in a good spot in the life your living is the important part, I also prefer just being around strangers less, but deep down that more because of my autism id like to be more social but I realise I just cant mask to save my life 

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  • in reply to RachelO

    thank you for being open it can be hard being open about the things that make our lives difficult, I hope you get in the positive side of the low mood soon, 

    I can relate to the rug being pulled and feeling like your self esteem went with it, the things that are new or mentally straining really make me feel bad when I realise I dont understand it or I cant trust my instincts in life on what I need to do,

    especially if im at work, like if I have my routine and its being changed and now I have to make a whole new plan on somthing I dont understand in the moment, or if im around people who understand the job, and changes to it quicker than me, when ive been doing it longer dont help, im a trying not to let people see or know that I dont understand it because I dont want people to see that im struggling 

    as long as you feel like your in a good spot in the life your living is the important part, I also prefer just being around strangers less, but deep down that more because of my autism id like to be more social but I realise I just cant mask to save my life 

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