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People make my life a living hell

Jono180185

I’m curious if anyone else has experienced something similar.

I’m autistic and tonight I’ve had to leave my own home because of extremely loud music being played by neighbours.

I’m currently sitting in my car somewhere quiet because I simply couldn’t cope with it anymore. I have a £300 pair of noise-cancelling headphones, which normally help me enormously, but the music was so loud that I could still hear it clearly through them.

What I find particularly upsetting is that it’s not just a case of finding the noise annoying. Once I reach that point of sensory overload, I genuinely cannot cope. Everything becomes overwhelming and my only option is to remove myself from the situation.

So I’ve had to get in my car, drive away from my own home and find somewhere quiet — and now I’m sitting here with no idea when it will be safe for me to go back.

I know that other people are entitled to enjoy themselves and have music on. I also know that the world cannot always accommodate my sensory needs. But there’s something incredibly frustrating and upsetting about having to physically leave your own home because your nervous system simply cannot tolerate what other people might consider “just a bit of loud music.”

I’m angry. I’m frustrated. And, if I’m honest, I’m feeling pretty bloody defeated tonight.

I suppose I’m posting because I’m wondering if anyone else understands this particular feeling — having to escape somewhere that is supposed to be your safe space because the sensory environment has become completely unbearable.

Sometimes I think the hardest part is knowing that people who don’t experience sensory overload will probably never understand why something that seems relatively trivial to them can completely derail your entire evening.

  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    I’m really sorry - that must be awful for you. I hope it quietens down a bit in September. 

  • That is a coincidence- this evening I drove away from my home as I was feeling overwhelmed and needed to get out and be on my own. I found it very hard to bring myself to go home, but in the end I had to as it didn’t really feel safe to be out on my own in the car so late. So I came home and opened a bottle of wine to try to calm my nervous system down a bit. But I still feel so awful. 

  • Hello, 

    I too, have had to drive away from my home due to loud neighbors. I hope you are safe now and can relax. I encounter noisy situations a lot and wear my ear defenders or I simply walk out and leave due to being overloaded. 

  • I get it. My neighbours have done a lot of work to their house in the time they have been there. The first year it was until 9 in the evening most nights. Whatever they do inside or out seems to involve noise. They have dogs that bark for ages which they ignore. As for music some of it is ok, but one member of the house usually when alone plays music with a deep bass and that goes right through me. When it went on for ages one evening I had to take myself for a walk to escape. I understand that there will be some element of noise but some people seem to have no consideration for others.

  • Yep I do, I spend most of summer indoors with the windows and doors shut because of the screaming kids over the hedge, competing music systems and stinking BBQ's, I watch my lovely garden get over grown every summer because I can't bear to be out there when theres so much noise and smells. At least the kids go back to school this week.

  • Yes I have this experience repeatedly with loud neighbours. And I am the same in that i don't expect people to accommodate my needs, but I also find it incredibly frustrating not being able to relax and feel safe in my own home. I can't always drive somewhere to get away feom it as I get that stressed from the noise that its not safe for me to drive. I hope you're okay now.