Feeling very stressed at someone parking on my property, is this because of my ASD or a mental health issue

Last Saturday when I got up there was a car parked on land I own at the rear of my property. Initially I thought it belonged to a new neighbour who had moved in the previous day and had perhaps simply parked there in ignorance not realising it was my private land. I've been looking every day since to try and catch my new neighbour to explain the situation but never caught him then last night I did and he said the car wasn't his. That threw me so I asked another neighbour and was told it belonged to someone farther down the street who she knew had gone on holiday but didn't know how long for. I know the person involved and he is certainly aware of the fact that I own the land in question. He doesn't have a parking space of his own and has to park on the publlc highway and for whatever reason it seems didn't want to leave his precious car there while he's away. He obviously has no manners and based on my limited exchanges with him I gathered he felt entitled and a bit arrogant. I suspect he chose my piece of land and not anyone else's as I'm old (77) and live alone and he knows I only use the land in question a few times a month. I see this car of his every time I go into my kitchen which is several times  day and it's like a red rag to a bull and  my stress / anxiety levels and anger are increasing all the time. I also have a serious heart condition which isn' t being helped by all this and that's making me worry on top of everything else. I've become totally consumed by the impudence / arrogance of what's happened now I know it's deliberate and can't calm down and I don't know what I can do about it all. I don't know the bloke's full name just his first name but I know the Whatsapp number of someone who knows him. I don't know whether to contact that person and if I do whether to be angry or not and whether to mention my ASD and my heart condition, and if I mention my ASD how do I make him understand the effect his trespass of my land is having on me.

Parents
  • I don't know what I can do about it all.

    A good starting point is to know the law:

    https://www.met.police.uk/advice/advice-and-information/pa/problems-with-parking/

    It’s important to remember that it is an offence to immobilise, move or restrict the movement of a motor vehicle in a way that would prevent the owner, or person responsible for the vehicle, from removing it.

    You need to give a owner reasonable notice to get it off your land:

    we recommend putting a notice on the vehicle itself, stating that if it is not removed within 14 days you will have it moved/removed.

    Sticking clear posters on the windshield saying that they are parked on private land and the car will be removed in 14 days is suggested. Getting a local tow company to remove it is the next logical step but you need to ask them about how the process works and how the owner can be notified on how to recover it.

    I don't know whether to contact that person and if I do whether to be angry or not and whether to mention my ASD and my heart condition, and if I mention my ASD how do I make him understand the effect his trespass of my land is having on me.

    I appreciate you are suffering as a result of this but in the eyes of the law I think it is irrelevant to the actions you can take - it will be more useful to know what you are able to do and shape your responses with this in mind.

    To manage the anger I would recommend using mindfulness to help put your frustration in context. This takes quite a bit of practice so may not help immediately but it is a great tool to help you cope with the frustrations caused by others in the long term.

    Considering what to do to prevent future problems you probably need to install signs to say it is private land and install removable barriers to prevent people who don't have a key from being able to unlock the barriers (posts with chains strung between them seems the simplest solution).

    Sorry that none of this can help your frustration and anger but knowing what you can and cannot legally do is a great place to start to take action that won't backfire on you.

    I hope some of the information is useful.

Reply
  • I don't know what I can do about it all.

    A good starting point is to know the law:

    https://www.met.police.uk/advice/advice-and-information/pa/problems-with-parking/

    It’s important to remember that it is an offence to immobilise, move or restrict the movement of a motor vehicle in a way that would prevent the owner, or person responsible for the vehicle, from removing it.

    You need to give a owner reasonable notice to get it off your land:

    we recommend putting a notice on the vehicle itself, stating that if it is not removed within 14 days you will have it moved/removed.

    Sticking clear posters on the windshield saying that they are parked on private land and the car will be removed in 14 days is suggested. Getting a local tow company to remove it is the next logical step but you need to ask them about how the process works and how the owner can be notified on how to recover it.

    I don't know whether to contact that person and if I do whether to be angry or not and whether to mention my ASD and my heart condition, and if I mention my ASD how do I make him understand the effect his trespass of my land is having on me.

    I appreciate you are suffering as a result of this but in the eyes of the law I think it is irrelevant to the actions you can take - it will be more useful to know what you are able to do and shape your responses with this in mind.

    To manage the anger I would recommend using mindfulness to help put your frustration in context. This takes quite a bit of practice so may not help immediately but it is a great tool to help you cope with the frustrations caused by others in the long term.

    Considering what to do to prevent future problems you probably need to install signs to say it is private land and install removable barriers to prevent people who don't have a key from being able to unlock the barriers (posts with chains strung between them seems the simplest solution).

    Sorry that none of this can help your frustration and anger but knowing what you can and cannot legally do is a great place to start to take action that won't backfire on you.

    I hope some of the information is useful.

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