I am new here and am seeking advice. I am the primary carer for my 89 year old mother. My older brother has recently confirmed that he has been assessed and diagnosed with autism, but he hasn't yet told our mother. He lives overseas and now wishes to play a bigger role in our mum's affairs but that is causing problems as he is choosing to get involved in tasks by doing his own research and then sending multiple, sometimes long emails with advice that often complicate matters. To be clear I am not asking him to input. This has the effect of slowing everything down, confusing our mum, and causes undue stress. I am finding it difficult to make progress on even small matters because of his desire to now be more involved. He lives over 1000 miles and visits once or twice a year. I've tried explaining in simple terms that either he leads on tasks or I do, but he seems to feel that he has a right to be involved and doesn't understand that what he is doing is unhelpful.
I am really not sure how to handle the dynamic. My mum feels the need to tell him everything. She writes everything down to tell him. She doesn't know about his assessment and probably won't understand what autism is. I am also worried about my brother's health as he seems to be obsessing slightly over family matters.
Does anyone have advice please?