Hello all
i wanted to share if anyone felt this. I can be fairly adept at social interactions with a wide range of people. I have certain defaults that allow me to interact with anyone, and I think it also can come at a price.
My strategy is like this:
- listen to the person I’m speaking to.
- ask questions based on what they are sharing with me
- remember details that they’re interested in so I can use that to follow up in future conversations
I find it really challenging to talk about myself with others. I do better sharing about myself if I know the person is intentionally listening to me and asks questions. Also if I talk about myself, I’m trying to find a way to frame it in a neurotypical way so I can be understood better, and try and frame it according to how neurotypical people see the world.
Sometimes this strategy doesn’t work. It’s better in 1 to 1 situations. I can sometimes feel small in group situations, and I have to calculate how to fit into that group, and then can’t keep up. If somebody that I’m speaking to is a talker, then my objective is to keep them talking and asking questions. the only negative with that is that I feel a disconnect. I want to share and feel a part of the conversation, and the best way to do it is to ask questions , but because I’m struggling to share about myself, I feel disconnected. The other person feels safe and comfortable and free, and I feel trapped, but atleast I can tick it off as a “good” conversation.