• Replies 8 replies
  • Subscribers 88 subscribers
  • Views 150 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Now I mostly just laugh

Bunny

Before I knew that I'm autistic, I'd often get frustrated or angry with myself about my clumsiness*. Now I can immediately remind myself that:

a) it's not my fault;
b) it will keep on happening;
c) I can do things to minimise risks; and
d) a better way to react to a clumsiness incident (for me) is to note it, consider whether I could do anything in future to avoid it, try to find the humour in it, and move on.

This example from today made me laugh out loud, and I think shows how far I've come:

I decided to open the second of the double doors to the living room, explaining to myself, out loud, that "I'd better open that, because I don't want to be banging into it again". Immediately after unbolting the door and opening it, I tripped over the slightly raised strip on the floor between the living room and the hall. And started laughing at the irony of the situation.

It wasn't my first clumsiness incident of the day, and certainly won't be the last - but I'm definitely finding that this approach works better for me.

* Which, for me, is related to differences in proprioception and vestibular processing, as explained in this NAS article:

NAS - Autism and sensory processing  

  • I’m always covered in bruises from bumping into things and misjudging distances. Yesterday I walked around with chocolate on my trousers where I sat on part of a magnum. It happens all the time to me, I just laugh too! 

  • I often bounce off walls, crash into things, find I've an invisible hole in my lip that food and drink fall out and dribble down my front when I'm wearing new clothes or with new people.

    My personal best was falling down a rabbit hole whilst thinking about Lewis Carroll. Everyone else laughs at this, but it's still a bit weird even by my standards.

  • I can relate to clumsiness, can fall over almost anything and I talk to myself. The talking helps to structure things. However my Mum was often tripping over things and she was not the autistic parent. And yes it does help to laugh sometimes. 

  • Thank you for your post, yes sometimes we just have to let go, I’m very likely to be dyspraxic, it’s not my fault, it’s just genetics and I’m not responsible for that.

    As autistic people i think we are all guilty of examining every situation to insure we did nothing wrong and acted as neurotypical as possible. The bumper sticker describes life, ***  happens. 

  • in reply to Cinnabar_wing
    Cinnabar_wing said:
    I think it's a way for the energy to escape and stop it building into stress.

    Exactly this. As Tesco says, "every little helps"!

    Cinnabar_wing said:
    He managed to try to put money into a vending machine, miss and then trip and fall in-between the machines, pirouetting round and end up sitting in a bin.

    Yikes! It sounds like that would have a made for a good video on You've Been Framed!

  • Full disclosure: it doesn't work every time.

    Just after posting this, I swore like a sailor after catapulting a spoonful of my lunch out of my bowl and across my desk. face exhaling

  • I think learning how to not take things too seriously is important.

    If you can just let things pass it helps to remain calm.

  • I think you're right that laughter really does help with frustration and turning a bad thing into something not so bad. I think it's a way for the energy to escape and stop it building into stress.

    I had a work colleague years ago that was very clumsy too. He managed to try to put money into a vending machine, miss and then trip and fall in-between the machines, pirouetting round and end up sitting in a bin. He would always laugh it off come to think of it, along with everyone else (after ensuring he was okay).

    (I think he was dyslexic and I wonder if he would get other labels these days).