"small talk" at work

Here are a few books that give a good overview of how to make the small talk and what to talk about:

How to Make Small Talk - Conversation Starters, Exercises, and Scenarios - Wadsworth, Melissa (2018)
ISBN 9781507204993

How to Talk to Anyone About Anything - Improve Your Social Skills, Master Small Talk, Connect Effortlessly, and Make Real Friends - W. Williams, James (2021)
ISBN‎ 195303635X

Stress-Free Small Talk - How to Master the Art of Conversation and Take Control of Your Social Anxiety - Gallagher LMFT, Richard S  (2020)
ISBN‎ 1641528958

They are not aimed specifically at autists but do teach you from the ground up on how to make small talk like an NT which seems to be what you are asking for.

pinkchocoholic said:

Just wondering if anyone has tips of suitable topics / conversations which I can focus talking to colleagues about

My advice is to keep things very general and don't get into topics in depth - in my experience people do not want to have an in depth conversation at work but use small talk as something akin to chewing gum just to pass the time.

It was an approach that served me well for many years where I was talking to people a lot as part of my job.

One good trick is to remember details about a persons life and use these to let them do the talking - eg asking about their children, a football team they follw, a car they are restoring etc. This approach makes them think you are taking an interest in them so will often make them more accepting of you.

The technique of asking open ended questions lets them do the talking and so long as you can look interested for as long as you need then the heavy lifting is done. The hard part is remembering what they have going on in their lives as it requires us to pay attention when we often don't really care that much.

This is just one approach that worked for me.

Good luck

Iain said:

few books that give a good overview of how to make the small talk and what to talk about

Thank you I'll have a look into them

Iain said:

One good trick is to remember details about a persons life and use these to let them do the talking

I'll try to do this! It sounds like a good way to have a conversation without needing to talk much!

Iain said:

few books that give a good overview of how to make the small talk and what to talk about

Thank you I'll have a look into them

Iain said:

One good trick is to remember details about a persons life and use these to let them do the talking

I'll try to do this! It sounds like a good way to have a conversation without needing to talk much!