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Why are traditional jobs so incompatible with us?

lina-chan

I hope the question makes sense as I am not too great at explaining things.

I have worked for 6+ years now in 3 different jobs; still in my 3rd job but looking to get out due to a restructure and also burnout due to being fed up of the role and also poor management. From my experience of working so far I find that although I can work, there's these underlying things that I will never understand i.e. Office Politics and such. As I used to do recruitment as well I am very aware of the fact that employers want you to fit a certain template as in, being the ideal employee who doesn't question anything if you get what I mean. If you aren't what they want or need they just get rid of you very slyly.

I don't know about other people, but for me personally as a creative person traditional jobs drain my energy and whenever I've tried to suggest ideas to improve a company (I.E. in my old job when looking for a deputy manager, I suggested adding incentives/benefits in the job ad to attract candidates and management shut that down) or create something to benefit the company (i.e. repographics) management has a go or they say we can't do X Y and Z.

I am now in the process of making an Etsy shop to sell art as I work full-time, starting as a side hustle (as I used to sell items online and enjoyed it) and hopefully turning it into a business. I find most of us tend to go self-employed or just don't bother working long because most jobs are just incompatible.

What do you think?

  • I've always prefered being self employed then I can set my own terms and conditions.

    I used to feel so trapped and claustrophobic at school and at work into my teens and twenties, I was in a constant low level panic state.

    I can't do interpersonal politics, I did try and learn, then I stopped after realising that I was never going to understand what was going on and any attempts at joining in ended up with me being ganged up on. I've never understood that mentality and I don't think I want to either, it's all so stupid. In the past when I've not been playing I've been played, taking at face value what people have said, when behind my back all sorts of machinations have been going on and it's all blown up in my face. I've been acused of playing games! I'm the only one who's not been playing games and if I did I would of been a lot more subtle about it. I could never work out what I was more offended and upset about, the whole needless situations I found myself in or the idea that people thought me so stupid as to play such infantile games? 

  • I personally have been unemployed for a while now, after failing at many jobs --not due to misbehaviour, arguments, but due to burnout. In some jobs I was exploited (paid 5 pounds an hour, for example), or verbally abused, and so on.

    That would be my first thought: we get hit harder and also process it more deeply and slowly.

    Other people would either cope or resign, and keep going. For me, those events have accumulated to a point of being hard to find any energy, not even for going outside. "Keep going" and "forget fast" aren't concepts my brain seems to really believe in.

    I agree with profdanger that jobs are pretty hard for all, and even harder for autistic individuals with certain impairments. If you struggle socially, or are just different, like avoiding a lot of small talk then that also adds up.

    That would be my second thought: the environment is simply unhealthy.

    An appropriate environment though, depends on each person and is hard to achieve. In many cases, I think that should be in place first, then the job.

    Even if you happen to have some skill (say, you are good at maths) it does not seem like the common set up with loads of deadlines and meetings is doable at all for us, or at least I would find it impossible.

    The last thought (restating your point): employers do not just seek skills, but a malleable personality, in an individual.

    As simple example, I don't think being very honest is useful either, which is strange. It's only useful if you do it when they want that.

    I like to think of a world where each autistic person is doing the activity they like, because that is also a safe-space. But that's not coming soon.

    With all that, I still like being authentic, honest, straightforward, and different --even if it plays exactly the wrong way.

  • Hi Lena. I can only say I've worked solidly from age 13 to 37 in increasingly high pressured & stressful jobs. I'm almost glad I had my burnout as it enabled me to reassess what my needs are and how I can help myself before I ask the same of an employer. Id been at an Airport for the past 10+yrs in different roles. I couldn't tolerate the office temperature & light changes, let alone the changing moods of the humans within the office setting. I prefer plants to people so I'm applying for a job in a local garden centre to get me back on my feet. I agree with profdanger creativity seems to be the key in whatever form that takes for us individually. Id love to be self employed but I blew my money trying to get the right diagnosis, by the time I found out there was nothing left; so I'm starting from scratch. I have been needle felting for 5yrs and thought about doing the same. I wish you all the best with the side hustle - in the hope it becomes a full hustle over time Slight smile

  • It’s so hard to find employment in general, but to find an employer with great staff that is willing and able to support you? Practically impossible. I’ve gotten lucky, I feel. My current employer is definitely accommodating for my needs.

    I personally would be terrified to be self-employed. I’m so bad at finances. Also, while I’m a creative (I write music) I don’t think I could earn a stable wage from that. Good for you if you feel that you can handle it. I’d say go for it!

  • I agree it's so hard, I recently made a list of accommodations I NEED not nice to have to work for an employer, I've been advised I need to pick the most important, yet they are all vital to stop me crashing out of work 

    I'm trying to think of ideas to be self employed 

    Love you are looking at your creative side, give you energy doing something that brings you joy while earning