Hello, I'm Fabian. 25 years old.
Since I was a kid, I have always felt different. I could never adapt socially, nor to have friends easily. People always said that I was shy, that's all. But recently, my partner told me about his suspicious, that I could be autistic. So I started to read a lot about the topic and watching videos.
I have never been too conscious about myself, until started therapy. So, I connect my findings about autism with the better conscious about myself, so everything have some sense to me. I don't know how to answer many times to people, don't know what they expect, how to react, how to talk, about what to talk, it's too much to me. I don't recognize my emotions easily, in fact, right now I just identified physical things and some times, many physical things and too intense. I can't change easily between tasks, many times it's too difficult if someone interrupts me. Big changes are a lot of feeling bad to me. “Small” changes too. Being focused in a conversation is highly difficult, many times, I think that I'm too slowly. Many things are missed understood by me, sometimes I don't recognize the level of seriousness or literalness. I think that I have had a lot of shutdowns and one burnout, right after finishing university. And I’m sure that there are some other things to say.
In my country it is hard to have a diagnosis. In fact, many psychologists here have a stereotype about autism. And my psychologist recognized that I could have some characteristics, but not enough.
So I have been thinking that a self diagnosis could help. But I'm not sure how to do it. And It could be valid? I’m afraid that could be assuming thing or appropriating about something that’s no me.
Thank you!!
PD: Sorry my English, I’m still learning it.
