Failed my first asd test due to being normal during a conversation which made me think since I was child bern bullied non stop so I've been trying to mask myself as normal as possible as a kid and it worked to some degree but when online on discord I show my real swlf but I can't do that to real people even my mother she's hard to talk with abd hates sounds abd mire very angry over simple things so I can't show her the real me but then again I don't know how to unmask years of hiding. Maybe I am normal thinking im not tbh ever since psychology diagnosed me as asd well told me all I think about because it nakes sense but when I see asd people im like I don't think im like them but I got so many debilitating issues with mental and starting to notice what sone if them are not. Like anxiety coming on due to sensory ir meltdowns I akways thought I was just being childish and upset over everything being overwhelming. It's hard not knowing if I truly am autistic ir adhd or something else but the issues gave been since childhood and only gotten far worse and I might bever fet the diagnosis I need to improve my life
