Diagnosis help

In my experience (and of others in my family) feeling slightly numb is entirely normal. There’s a lot of mental energy that goes into the lead up to getting an assessment, and then the assessment itself, and it occupies you and then when you actually get the diagnosis it’s almost like ‘what now?’ - like you’ve lost your occupation and feel a bit lost. My advice is just give it time, give everything time. Don’t rush in to anything. It takes time to sink in. Go very easy on yourself, as much as you can take care of yourself and nurture yourself, do things that you enjoy and bring you comfort for a while. It’s a lot to process. It’s a good thing though - getting a diagnosis - and I’m happy for you. I think it’s helpful for most people who get the diagnosis - but it can also bring up some feelings and memories that take a while to work through. 

Hi Ma.ra. 

It’s comforting to hear that I’m not the only one that dealt with this after diagnosis! I’ve been using this community for a while now and it does really help just to connect and share with others in the same or similar boat. 

I hope you’re doing well now after your diagnosis and thank you for taking time out to reply to me it’s really helpful and much appreciated! 

Thank you - I have always felt different throughout life so this does provide me with some reasoning and almost comfort in a way but also still feeling this cloud of numbness I suppose. I know like you say that this will undoubtedly shift over time so I just need to remember that this dysregulation is normal and completely okay to sit with. 

Yes therapy was a recommendation during the feedback call - for CBT-A and another type of therapy that I didn’t quite catch the name of but I’m sure I will find this out soon. This will be on my to do list to look into when I feel up to it. 

I really appreciate the time you’ve taken to give this advice and the links and I will certainly be utilising them. 

Thanks so much again!

I think this is exactly it, I just didn’t feel what I was expecting. Although I tried not to have expectations of anything it can be difficult to switch this off. 

The uncertainty was definitely one of the worst parts for me, I have done research upon research and then even more to top it off throughout the time waiting, so the validation of a diagnosis is a relief in some ways. 

I have just sat down with a much needed coffee and slice of cake as there’s not much that can’t fix (at least in the moment). 

Thank you for your kind words and insight also. 

Just wanted to say thanks for those links, I've saved a few of those for later!

Hello Remigirl !

Sorry to hear you’re feeling overwhelmed, but also congrats on your diagnosis! I got mine two months ago and felt confused, kind of happy, and then suddenly very, very sad. I shared my sadness here with the community, and since then I’ve been reading posts and replying to people. It calms me, makes me smile, and feels like a little manual for how to cope with all of this.

Sometimes other members write really cute things and it makes me feel welcome on this planet. I wish you all the best! And yes, I eat more cake since my diagnosis and drink lots of good hot tea, just like Stuart333 said!

Congratulations on your diagnosis!

Following a diagnosis, it can be common for us to have a period where we experience lot of emotional dysregulation.

Besides perhaps feeling relieved about now knowing that autism explains our difficulties, this can also include experiencing mixes of feelings like numbness, confusion, uncertainty, "imposter syndrome", (backward-focused) anger, frustration, grieving, and more. So please don't worry - it's normal, and your feelings might well vary over the coming days and months. 

I soon realised after my own diagnosis that it was going to be the start of a new learning journey, rather than a conclusion that came complete with instant solutions for my difficulties.

The NAS has a great set of articles focused on "after diagnosis", including one covering how you might feel during the subsequent days / weeks / months. You might find them of interest and/or helpful:

NAS - How you might feel after a diagnosis - includes perspectives from other autistics

NAS - Other advice covering post-diagnosis including:

• Talking about and disclosing your autism diagnosis
• Emotional support for family members after a diagnosis
• Formal support following an autism diagnosis
• What can I do if formal support is not offered or is not enough

Therapy (or counselling) is often recommended after a diagnosis, as a follow up action for your GP to arrange. If you prefer, depending on where you are in the UK, you may instead be able to self refer for talking therapy on the NHS.

Before arranging it, you might find it helpful to borrow or buy this book, which includes discussion of various types of therapy and counselling, together with advice on choosing the right therapist or counsellor - all from an autistic person's viewpoint. Several of us here have found it very helpful:

The Autistic Survival Guide to Therapy

Finally, I'll just mention a couple of books that I and others have found helpful early on in our post-diagnosis journeys:

Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask!

How to Be Autistic (free download currently available via this page)

Remigirl said:

What happens regarding an ADHD assessment following on from this?

Once they've received your diagnosis report, your GP should arrange this - and Right to Choose is again available as an option (in England only). 

I felt numb for a few days. The first day I didn't feel what I expected.

You also go from being the centre of attention with people are interested in you, to just being you again.

You think some magic wand will come, but you are still you and your problems haven't gone.

By the end of the process the decision is a relief, because uncertainty is stressful, but also not surprise.

You will want to tell everyone, but try to limit it to only a couple of people for a while.

Just being nice to yourself. Have a cup of tea and a cake and give yourself a few days without too much pressure.