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Is it possible to become 'Good' at speaking on the phone?

Pixl Monkey

Hi. I’m curious as to whether I can become good speaking on the phone? Autism is a real barrier when it comes to using the phone and has always been a problem for me. I’m not too bad when I can plan for the call but when it’s a random call it throws me.

I’ve wanted to be an NHS ambulance call handler for some time and this year did a training assessment which I unfortunately failed, due to my skills or rather lack of skills when it comes to using the phone.

I was disappointed to fail as I’d been working hard at getting better on the phone and watched many training videos but it’s still a big problem for me.

  • I could hardly use a phone in my 20s. It was too scary. I had to fit some things but it would take hours to build up, I'd plan everything, I'd sweat, etc.

    When I was 22 I had to call a supplier and it took me 2 days to build up the courage. I got pressured by my boss.

    I had jobs in phone companies for over 20 years after that. Being in conference calls for hours, leading technical discussions, reviewing hundreds of issues, etc. it went from being scared to never being off the thing. But this was often with people I knew or, the majority I knew.

    I still find it hard to pick up the phone to call a company I don't know, even to buy something.

    The only real solution is repetition.

    A significant help is not planning the call. No more than 20 seconds planning, then call. You have a brief idea, then go. Your s roots never really work, because people always say something unexpected. So don't plan too much. Focus on the end goal, what do you want on really need to know, make sure you get that. The rest is just padding and you can go with the flow.

    Just imagine you know them. You are just having a chat. After all a stranger is a friend who you are just talking to for the first time.

    Most of the time the other person is no more better at it than you. They just don't worry about it 

    The problem with public, rather than business calls is some people are nasty, abusive and crazy.

  • I'm sorry I'm awful with phonecalls so can't give advice, but someone was telling me about life coaches, maybe there are some positive programmes out there to help? It might help if you say what it is you can't do? 

    For me even the thought of making them is difficult, and I have to really concentrate when I'm on it, have some paper for notes if I need, and to doodle, and tend to stim by rocking back and forth or curl up which I only recently realised I was doing.

    Is it the conversation for you? Having a check list to run through could help?