Black and white, or shades of grey thinking

I see many people here talk of black and white thinking and that it's a very ND thing. I rarely think in black and white and nearly always in shades of grey, for me everyhthing is about context and nuance. Often I find black and white thinking like being slapped in the face by a wet fish, it's such a shock, it's also not something I particularly associate with ND but with with mostly male NT's.

It's something I find quite alienating, something that marks me out as different to both other ND's and NT's. It's not that I can't be analytical or decisive, although to some it may seem so, usually when I disagree with them and it's a case of refusing to take their stance, or be bounced into something I'm unsure of. Although I do tend to let things happen organically, the right thing comes at the right time without interfearance from me.

Are you all black and white, or are you grey?

What's your experience of being asked to think in the opposite way?

Parents
  • 'Oh Lord, please dont' let me be misunderstood' as they song says, but the way everyone is sayng they think in B&W and can't cope with shades of grey is making me feel misunderstood and question my place here and as an autistic person? B&W thinking and a dislike of shades of grey seems to be one of the few commonalities, but not one I share.

Reply
  • 'Oh Lord, please dont' let me be misunderstood' as they song says, but the way everyone is sayng they think in B&W and can't cope with shades of grey is making me feel misunderstood and question my place here and as an autistic person? B&W thinking and a dislike of shades of grey seems to be one of the few commonalities, but not one I share.

Children
  • the way everyone is sayng they think in B&W and can't cope with shades of grey is making me feel misunderstood and question my place here and as an autistic person? B&W

    I don’t understand a lot of people or understand how some of your experiences are for you, but I don’t think anybody fully understands what something is like from another’s perspective, even though there are sometimes replies to people in other posts which say “I know exactly what that is like because I am going through that”. 

    Has anybody here said they don’t understand you? 

    If people didn’t think you had a place here as an autistic person, I think it is unlikely they would engage with you. 

  • I wouldn't worry. I don't obviously stim which made me wonder. But people are different. 

    Like I said, if you are not stressed it is a lot easier. I think you have arranged your life to minimise stress, intentionally or otherwise, so you maybe don't see it. Pressure is what makes it more obvious.

    You might just not have any issues where it has been a problem so don't have examples.

  • Say I think the majority of autistics can think B&W but not all do so. I think it’s good you are able to see the shades of grey, only shades of grey I see are in my carpets lol! 

    Like many autistics seem to struggle with eye contact but I seem to be ok with that, unless they aren’t nice to me but I suppose that could be more of a natural response Confused