Traits (that we share?)

Hi all. I was thinking of several traits and ways of thinking I have (some autistic, no doubt about it) that I know aren’t neurotypical, and I wanted to know if they were shared by people in this forum at all — and if so, by many? Here we go:

  • In need of darkness (environments with little light) and therefore much more comfortable at night than during daylight. 
  • In need of a mild temperature or cold weather but never hot (weather) as it also comes with strong light that gets you anxious. 
  • Avoiding social contact (especially on the street out of the blue) and even if it happens and everything goes well and gets pleasant, really wishing it doesn’t happen again in as long as possible — because you can’t avoid thinking next time it may be absolutely terrible for a myriad of reasons and it’s draining anyways. 
  • Obsessed about different things, including your special interests, and feeling you’re not in control — like you’re a passenger that is inside a train that is going extremely fast and can’t be stopped or slowed down. You feel drained about it too and also guilty, but there’s not much you can do.
  • People you spend most of the time with, like partners or family, tend to say you’re rude when you’re convinced you aren’t. They always say the expression of your face says otherwise, but you can’t control it at all.
  • You feel you waste time all the time as you get distracted with lots of things/you can’t stop doing what you’re doing easily — like transitioning from one thing to another is not that simple and you need to really insist before it finally happens. Due to this, you do things almost running afterwards because you feel there’s little time left after already having wasted a lot of time. I mean, for example, you’ll prepare yourself a coffee moving close to running and like that back and forth with other chores. 
  • Mouth stimming instead of hands/hips, etc.? I mean, mouth like tongue biting or lip/cheek picking.
  • A tendency to be seen as a very serious person even if that’s not ever planned. Naturally, you’re very serious.
  • A natural rejection towards travelling (holidays), going to the beach, and swimming pool in summer. 
  • An impossible-to-control sensitivity to music that you can’t stand. If it’s your style, you can be extremely emotional and excited, but if it’s the other way around, it’s even painful and will leave you feeling like ***.
  • Going to a restaurant is a no no if it depends on you. Choosing is always almost impossible and you feel super anxious but sometimes you have to go 

Well, I know some of the traits mentioned have been mentioned countless times but I am just throwing them in as they form who I am if that makes any sense. Thanks!

Parents
  • I don't like strong lighting, sun or electric and over head lights really feel oppressive. I dont' like hot either, anything over about 22.C is to much for me.

    I have what's known as "resting *** face", my natural resting expression looks a bit forbidding and stern, but I' usually in a little world of my own, quite happy thinking my own thoughts.

    I dont' eat out any more, I've got so many allergies and intolerances that it's just not worth it, especially where I live there's not much choice and I'd pretty much have to go to 3 different restaurants for 3 different courses. It feels like if you have allergies and intollerances you're not allowed not to like something. I'm often lucky if there's one thing on the menu I an eat, let alone if I want to eat it. Lots of restaurant food is rubbish and I come away thinking I've spent megabucks on something I could of bought for 99p and heated up myself.

    I also don't go out to eat as I end up sitting near someone who's perfume gives me a headache and makes me wheeze.

    One of my allergies is chlorine so swimming pools are a big no no and I swim like a brick, I like the beach but prefer them out of season,.

    Other peoples music does my head in and why do shops have to have two or three different radios in different partd of the shop?

Reply
  • I don't like strong lighting, sun or electric and over head lights really feel oppressive. I dont' like hot either, anything over about 22.C is to much for me.

    I have what's known as "resting *** face", my natural resting expression looks a bit forbidding and stern, but I' usually in a little world of my own, quite happy thinking my own thoughts.

    I dont' eat out any more, I've got so many allergies and intolerances that it's just not worth it, especially where I live there's not much choice and I'd pretty much have to go to 3 different restaurants for 3 different courses. It feels like if you have allergies and intollerances you're not allowed not to like something. I'm often lucky if there's one thing on the menu I an eat, let alone if I want to eat it. Lots of restaurant food is rubbish and I come away thinking I've spent megabucks on something I could of bought for 99p and heated up myself.

    I also don't go out to eat as I end up sitting near someone who's perfume gives me a headache and makes me wheeze.

    One of my allergies is chlorine so swimming pools are a big no no and I swim like a brick, I like the beach but prefer them out of season,.

    Other peoples music does my head in and why do shops have to have two or three different radios in different partd of the shop?

Children
  • Hi. Thanks for your message. Food allergies and intolerances, I feel you. I’m the same. I have to be so careful with what I eat. Eating out is always such a stress. If something has garlic or onion (99% of dishes have it) I can’t touch it. Otherwise, the week is sort of over as I take forever to recover from their effects in my body. 

    I could’ve made a list 3 times bigger. Smells! That’s an important one too. I feel pretty lonely with that. So few people (nobody!) understand me when I say I can’t stand that place or that person because of the smell…

    I guess I’m not the only one having a phobia to phone calls, right? I know other autistic people have it too but I don’t know if it’s something that is very common or not so common. I struggle with that much more than I’d like to admit. I just hate so much speaking on the phone. I’ll do it if needed but it just ruins my nerves and then I hate myself for feeling this way.

    Sorry about your chlorine allergy. That’s a clear red line to getting inside any swimming pool no matter what. The good thing is summer is over (but the cold with the global warming seems to be disappearing year after year which is so sad at least for me)… Well, nice to meet you Raised hand