Feelings after diagnosis

I'm not formally diagnosed, but after discovering I was almost certainly on the spectrum I felt shocked and confused, however after doing lots of research and learning about autism I gradually relaxed and found my true self. It takes time, and I wish you well on your journey.

After discovering accidentally, that the autism spectrum seems to describe perfectly my life long problems i felt shocked to the point if meltdown.  I was and still am very much into space and aliens. I watched an interview between David Grusch and Joe Rogan, Grusch talked about Mussolini UFO case and also about retaliation for his testimony for the congress and then Grusch mentioned his mental health issues,  that he was diagnosed high functioning Autistic. At that point i stopped the video and got intrigued what is this high functioning autism.  When I checked the female characteristics i had to throw myself a cold high pressure shower. First I dismissed it i thought it was my delusion, but then a month later Youtube attacked me with autism and I found very informative videos from Paul Michalleff. Now I have a therapy and my therapist has also suspicion that im autistic.  I don't know if I get tested and diagnosed or not, but this is the first doctor who takes me seriously and not only "1 pill per day and think positively". I was treated many times by professionals this way.

After discovering accidentally, that the autism spectrum seems to describe perfectly my life long problems i felt shocked to the point if meltdown.  I was and still am very much into space and aliens. I watched an interview between David Grusch and Joe Rogan, Grusch talked about Mussolini UFO case and also about retaliation for his testimony for the congress and then Grusch mentioned his mental health issues,  that he was diagnosed high functioning Autistic. At that point i stopped the video and got intrigued what is this high functioning autism.  When I checked the female characteristics i had to throw myself a cold high pressure shower. First I dismissed it i thought it was my delusion, but then a month later Youtube attacked me with autism and I found very informative videos from Paul Michalleff. Now I have a therapy and my therapist has also suspicion that im autistic.  I don't know if I get tested and diagnosed or not, but this is the first doctor who takes me seriously and not only "1 pill per day and think positively". I was treated many times by professionals this way.