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Post-diagnosis mindset

alushjoyhand

Hello,

I received my diagnosis three weeks ago, aged 42.

The initial rush of identification arose and made me feel incredible. This subsided and I am now reflecting on the elements of how I function that I resent for their inefficiency.

For example, periods of relentless bleakness in the darker months of the year, disbelief in my ability to meaningfully connect to others, loss of humour and warmth, fixation on highly morbid topics and self-destructive information.

I presume this is both logical and valid, as I recompute all the assumptions about my understanding of myself and my relationship to the world that had been in place for many years. In short, I am scared and sad.

For other diagnosed adults, what was your experience? Have I missed an established thread to which I should instead refer? Is this the best place for such a question?

Advice welcome. Slight smile

Parents

  • Congratulations on your diagnosis and welcome to the community.

    Following a diagnosis, it can be common for us to experience a lot of emotional dysregulation. Besides perhaps feeling some relief about now having an explanation for our past difficulties, this can also include working through a phase where we experience confusion, uncertainty, so-called "imposter syndrome", and/or (backward-focused) anger, frustration, grieving, and more. So please don't worry - it's normal! 

    As for many others here, my own diagnosis turned out to be much more of the start of a new journey, rather than a conclusion full of instant solutions for my difficulties.

    The NAS has a great set of articles focused on "after diagnosis", including one covering how you might feel during the subsequent days / weeks / months. You might find them of interest and/or helpful:

    NAS - How you might feel after a diagnosis - includes perspectives from other autistics

    NAS - Other advice covering post-diagnosis including:

    • Talking about and disclosing your autism diagnosis
    • Emotional support for family members after a diagnosis
    • Formal support following an autism diagnosis
    • What can I do if formal support is not offered or is not enough

    Therapy (or counselling) is often recommended after a diagnosis, as a follow up action for your GP to arrange. If you prefer, depending on where you are in the UK, you may instead be able to self refer for talking therapy on the NHS.

    Before arranging it, you might find it helpful to borrow or buy this book, which includes discussion of various types of therapy and counselling, together with advice on choosing the right therapist or counsellor - all from an autistic person's viewpoint. Several of us here have found it very helpful:

    The Autistic Survival Guide to Therapy

    This book also taught me some important principles and enabled me to make some immediate, helpful changes - perhaps you might find it useful, too:

    Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask!

Reply

  • Congratulations on your diagnosis and welcome to the community.

    Following a diagnosis, it can be common for us to experience a lot of emotional dysregulation. Besides perhaps feeling some relief about now having an explanation for our past difficulties, this can also include working through a phase where we experience confusion, uncertainty, so-called "imposter syndrome", and/or (backward-focused) anger, frustration, grieving, and more. So please don't worry - it's normal! 

    As for many others here, my own diagnosis turned out to be much more of the start of a new journey, rather than a conclusion full of instant solutions for my difficulties.

    The NAS has a great set of articles focused on "after diagnosis", including one covering how you might feel during the subsequent days / weeks / months. You might find them of interest and/or helpful:

    NAS - How you might feel after a diagnosis - includes perspectives from other autistics

    NAS - Other advice covering post-diagnosis including:

    • Talking about and disclosing your autism diagnosis
    • Emotional support for family members after a diagnosis
    • Formal support following an autism diagnosis
    • What can I do if formal support is not offered or is not enough

    Therapy (or counselling) is often recommended after a diagnosis, as a follow up action for your GP to arrange. If you prefer, depending on where you are in the UK, you may instead be able to self refer for talking therapy on the NHS.

    Before arranging it, you might find it helpful to borrow or buy this book, which includes discussion of various types of therapy and counselling, together with advice on choosing the right therapist or counsellor - all from an autistic person's viewpoint. Several of us here have found it very helpful:

    The Autistic Survival Guide to Therapy

    This book also taught me some important principles and enabled me to make some immediate, helpful changes - perhaps you might find it useful, too:

    Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask!

Children