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Feeling so embarrassed

Elfilis

This is more of a rant post and could possibly be triggering

Ugh, what an awful day today! Just wanted to have a chat with my mum over the phone due to an awful night sleep and summer distressing me, well I ended up having a real meltdown and then mum hung up on me leading me to really get upset and cry really loud like I was having a temper tantrum and forgot all the windows were open. Next thing people are knocking on the door seeing what’s happening and turns out to be two guys from like a crisis ambulance or something. So I had to explain everything to them and then spoke with a very nice and caring lady on the crisis line. Everyone was very supportive there. But I feel so embarrassed now because everyone in the block of flats has heard me and now I’m the gossip of the block. I’m staying at my nans as she’s not here but I just want to be back at mine now, not at mine due to work but tempting to put my mattress in the living room. Mum blocked me and probably even got everyone in the family to block me not that I’m close with them but it’s like they want shut of me. I just feel such in embarrassed idiot now. 

Parents

  • Turn it into a positive.

    You now know people around you care.

    You may find people will check you're ok. They may talk to you more. You might make new friend.

    If they ask, don't shut down and try to be invisible, say  thank you for asking I appreciate your concern, I had some bad news. If you get friendly with one, you might want to offer more. People may be more supportive than you think.

    Everyone has distressing times in their life. The other people won't know what happened, and you don't need to tell them. There is nothing to be ashamed about.

    Don't be scared. You did nothing wrong. If it was your neighbour who had done it, what would you say to them?

  • in reply to Stuart333

    Thank you for replying. I understand what you’re saying and not to be embarrassed, I think it’s because the neighbours don’t know me that well and I’m worried they will think I will cause all sorts of chaos. But one thing I can say is they are been much more caring that what my “family” have. Mum won’t even talk to me or reply to my emails or voice messages as she’s blocked me and my nan is angry with me for “upsetting” my mum when it’s the other way around. Me and mum were like best of friends but her narcissistic sister came and turned my mum against me and became narcissistic towards me herself. I’ve always hoped one day my loving mum would come back to me but now I’m worried she’s cutting me out for good! 

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  • in reply to Stuart333

    Thank you for replying. I understand what you’re saying and not to be embarrassed, I think it’s because the neighbours don’t know me that well and I’m worried they will think I will cause all sorts of chaos. But one thing I can say is they are been much more caring that what my “family” have. Mum won’t even talk to me or reply to my emails or voice messages as she’s blocked me and my nan is angry with me for “upsetting” my mum when it’s the other way around. Me and mum were like best of friends but her narcissistic sister came and turned my mum against me and became narcissistic towards me herself. I’ve always hoped one day my loving mum would come back to me but now I’m worried she’s cutting me out for good! 

Children
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