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Swallowing/chewing sounds

Geeky Gothic Guy

I’m sure I’m not alone in this, but anybody got any tips on how to cope with it? Certain sounds just drive me up the wall, one of them is swallowing/chewing…it drives me absolutely mad to the point I’m literally pulling my hair out, what’s left of it. 
I find my partner to be particularly loud when slurping/seallowing drinks, and I often have to sit blocking my ears with my fingers or using earplugs, it drives me insane, and to be fair I probably drive her insane too with my unreasonable reaction.

Anybody got any long term solutions? Or psychological tricks I can use to try manage it? There’s plenty of other sounds that drive me absolutely insane, but because involves my partner I want to be able to try and manage it better.

thankyou

  • I grew up in a household with someone who chewed their food politely with their mouth closed but still all too audible to me. 

    An always ultra-determined chomping is how I perceived their chewing activity.  Most off-putting.

    I used to try and initiate / self-generate in my head (silent to other diners); an "earworm": a looped ...song / music track / recite an aphorism / psalm / hymn / prayer / poem / nursery rhyme / times table etc.

    I don't mean playing a song over headphones - instead, think of it in your head as a distraction, or meditation.

    The same strategy has been useful in workplace canteens (another really tough auditory environment), or on an aeroplane.

  • Oh man yeah it’s a tough one, worse when you raise your head and see the mouth open as they chew :S

  • I also experience this, and so does my partner. It's known as misophonia. Although it's not currently recognised in the diagnostic manuals (either DSM or ICD), a proposal was submitted last year for it to be added to the ICD manual.

    You might find the information and suggestions for coping strategies here helpful:

    Reframing Autism (AU) - Sensory Overload: Navigating Misophonia in Daily Life

    Reframing Autism (AU) - Living with Misophonia: “I Love You, but I Hate the Noises You Make”

  • I hate these sounds too no advice though 

  • in reply to Phased
    Phased said:
    For me if the food is good then I don't notice other people's eating sounds so much.

    Now that you mention it, I find visiting a restaurant quite hard to tolerate, except for the bit in the middle when I'm eating. I often hyperfocus on food, particularly nice flavours and textures, and the rest of the world fades away. The downside is that I look up and see someone's questioning expression and realise I haven't heard a word they were saying. (She's gotten used to it over the years and just starts again.)

  • in reply to Phased

    PS = suggestion from google is miss.wiring in the brain regions that triggers a "fight or flight" response.  Personally I was the youngest of five in a household where the tiny kitchen table didn;t seat the whole family.  So I ate alone a lot as a child - hmmm... maybe a link.  Thanks for the discussion stimulus  

  • in reply to Phased

    OK - so google suggestions are: telling others about it (hmmm.... how to not make friends an influence people.... and after all eating together is one of the best forms of socialisation out there...)

    Noise cancelling headphones or sound management (not great for dinner table conversation!)

    CBT or similar to manage emotional responses (OK - chosing to focus on something else I reckon works sometimes)

    Lifestyle adjustments - reckon this is the biggest one for me ... If I'm not so stressed or "wired" that it's a lot easier to both not notice it or not care so much...

  • When it comes to the crunch you are not alone.... can drive me crazy too.  Others eating crisps while we're watching TV!!!   For me if the food is good then I don't notice other people's eating sounds so much.  I have pointed out to my children that it is considered rude to chew with the mouth open. My partner picked up on my saying this and is aware of how much it aggravates me.  It is one of the weirdest things to get stirred up about tho' perhaps?  I can get an insight into why sensitisation to loud noises is relevant.   But why the heck eating noises???  Will ask a search engine and get back on that :-)

  • I think this is one of those classic Autism sensitivities. It is the sensory equivalent to the "special interest in trains" stereotype. My daughter won't sit directly across the dinner table from me because she says my chewing is too loud. She eats all other meals alone on the couch.

    Comedian Pierre Novellie published a book about his Autism and writes that chewing noises really set him off. Let me go remind myself if he has any solutions ... [goes to get book] ... nope, nothing helpful, he just observes that, "if you chew with your mouth open you have failed as an adult".

    Tips?

    I suppose sit further apart while eating, or maybe side-by-side, so the noise is projected away from you.

    Play music while eating together at the table.

    Take the stoical approach and accept that it is going to happen, tell yourself in advance that it is just a natural sound that is to be expected and that, as you cannot do much about it, you should just endure it with dignity. And ... breathe. (That's been helpful for me for lots of things.)

  • I have to have music or TV on when have family meals - as chewing noise is a problem for me

    Slurping less bothered about