Experiences of people diagnosed with ASD as Adults

Hi everyone,

I'm looking for advice and insights from people who have gone through the adult diagnosis process for Autism Spectrum Disorder. I'm in my mid-30s and have struggled with my mental health and feeling constantly overwhelmed for most of my life.

Several years ago, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), but I’ve never fully related to the diagnostic criteria, and I’ve always had a sense that it didn’t quite fit. Over the past couple of years, I started working in child development and, through learning more about autism, I began to recognize a lot of traits in myself. This led me to research further — particularly about how many girls mask effectively in childhood and are often missed in the diagnostic process. I also came across information about the high rate of BPD misdiagnosis in women due to overlapping signs like emotional dysregulation.

Now, I’m considering challenging my current diagnosis and asking to be assessed for ASD through my local mental health team. However, I do have a few concerns. Living with a BPD diagnosis has been difficult — it’s a heavily stigmatized condition, and I’ve personally experienced that stigma. For example, I wasn’t taken seriously during a serious health issue in pregnancy, and I’ve also found that NHS support for BPD is limited and difficult to access.

What I’m really hoping to understand is:

-If you were diagnosed with ASD as an adult, have you experienced stigma since your diagnosis?

-Has the diagnosis been helpful or meaningful for you? In what ways has it improved your life, if at all?

-Are there any NHS treatments or supports available to autistic adults, such as occupational therapy or mental health services tailored to neurodivergent people?

I’ve masked for many years and have just about managed to get by, but I’m exhausted. I don’t want a diagnosis for the label — only if it could genuinely help improve my quality of life. I know that’s a deeply personal experience and different for everyone, but I’d really appreciate hearing from others who’ve been through this journey.

Thank you for reading. 

Parents
  • Hi JB89,

    I found your post really interesting as I work in secondary mental health and now have a diagnosis of ASD and ADHD.

    I have found the ADHD diagnosis and my new ASD DX helpful .

    Regarding BPD there is a big overlap with ASD We are working with   more women with BPD looking for an ASD diagnosis . Please note Iam  non clinical so am not a Psychiatrist or Psychologist just lived experience 

    The support for ASD doesn't seem great but I think there's less of a stigma than for BPD .I guess there's always the worry of a new diagnosis 

    Dr Tony Atwood AsD expert  on line explain the similarities and the difference of the 2 but they have a big overlap .

    Hopefully there will be some people on here with experience of both.

    Good luck 

Reply
  • Hi JB89,

    I found your post really interesting as I work in secondary mental health and now have a diagnosis of ASD and ADHD.

    I have found the ADHD diagnosis and my new ASD DX helpful .

    Regarding BPD there is a big overlap with ASD We are working with   more women with BPD looking for an ASD diagnosis . Please note Iam  non clinical so am not a Psychiatrist or Psychologist just lived experience 

    The support for ASD doesn't seem great but I think there's less of a stigma than for BPD .I guess there's always the worry of a new diagnosis 

    Dr Tony Atwood AsD expert  on line explain the similarities and the difference of the 2 but they have a big overlap .

    Hopefully there will be some people on here with experience of both.

    Good luck 

Children
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