Assessment over

Well done and congratulations Stimpson.

Im glad you found the experience manageable. I will pass this on to my friend as he has a ADHD assessment with the same provider in October, he had also been on the NHS list for over 3 years. 
I had my AS diagnosis in June this year and haven’t been present on here much since. I’ve lost my enthusiasm for most things but hoping it returns soon. 

Congratulations on getting your diagnosis and its hood you shared here with us. I will do the same if I ever get the dx. 

Stimpson said:

what makes it hard, for me at least, is that I feel that I’m lying to people / or finding it hard when the subject comes up, that  I’m being deceitful  - and that makes me feel terrible. I find lying to be very hard anyway.

I feel this way too. I can imagine feeling a bit lighter after telling work colleagues. It does cross my mind to do so most days, and getting rid of one thing in my head would be beneficial. 

Thank you  

Thank you for sharing that. It sounds like such a big moment after such a long wait. Three years on the NHS list must have felt endless, so it is really good to hear that you were able to go through RTC and found the doctor supportive. Getting a diagnosis in adulthood can bring up all sorts of feelings, from relief and validation to uncertainty about what it means going forward. It is completely fine not to have all the answers right now about who to tell or what to do next. Giving yourself a little time to sit with it and notice how you feel is a good first step.

You have already done something important by sharing it here. That in itself is a milestone, almost like saying to yourself, “this is real and I do not have to carry it alone.” Whether you decide to tell others is entirely your choice, and you can do it at your own pace. You deserve a lot of credit for getting through such a long and difficult process and finally having some clarity.

Hey

Thanks for the post. yeah it’s been a tough 2 months trying to figure out how/if to tell people. Only just told my folks who are late 70s who still don’t really want to accept it - but I’ve just told them not to even think about it as it doesn’t change anything. Funnily enough I’ve told boss at work just this week which was hard but I’m happy I’ve done It (in confidence) but now I’ve told them I may choose to tell my team too. Feels like a small weight has been lifted. 
for many years I’ve been thinking daily about assessment and the results - then thinking daily about telling people. I just decided that I’m not sure I can continue with that in my head forever.

what makes it hard, for me at least, is that I feel that I’m lying to people / or finding it hard when the subject comes up, that  I’m being deceitful  - and that makes me feel terrible. I find lying to be very hard anyway.

The coming to terms was actually really easy as I wasn’t thinking otherwise - Just my daily worry turned into another daily worry (worry prob not the right word). 

Good luck in whatever you choose - no right/wrong way, just try to do what’s best for you

Hi

Congratulations on your diagnosis.

I am newly diagnosed and have only told close family. I figured its probably better to come to terms with the diagnosis myself first.

Hope things are going well for you

Congratulations on your diagnosis!

I had a similar experience in respect of being on the NHS waiting list, before switching to RTC via the same provider as you. After all the stress of waiting and the assessment itself, my own diagnosis then turned out to be the start of a new journey, rather than a conclusion full of solutions.

In terms of immediate next steps, I'd suggest giving yourself some time and breathing space to process and absorb everything that you've been through, and let your feelings settle down.

The NAS has a great set of articles focused on "after diagnosis", including one covering how you might feel during the subsequent days / weeks / months. You might find them of interest and/or helpful:

NAS - How you might feel after a diagnosis

NAS - Other advice covering post-diagnosis including:

• Talking about and disclosing your autism diagnosis
• Emotional support for family members after a diagnosis
• Formal support following an autism diagnosis
• What can I do if formal support is not offered or is not enough

My assessment report included some actions for my GP (various referrals, plus some medication recommendations for my mental health issues), along with a list of standard suggestions for me at the end.

From my and others' experiences of being assessed via RTC, I should flag that ongoing support beyond the point of diagnosis might not be offered as seamlessly as it should be - or sometimes even at all - compared to the NHS pathway. So, just by way of warning, it might be the case that you will need to take a more active role than you might expect in ensuring that you receive the further support that you're entitled to.

A common next step - and one of the GP recommendations in my report - was for them to arrange therapy. If you prefer, depending on where you are in the UK, you may instead be able to self refer for talking therapy on the NHS.

Before having this, you might find it helpful to borrow or buy this book. It discusses various types of therapy and counselling, together with advice on choosing the right therapist or counsellor - all from an autistic person's viewpoint. Several of us here have found it very helpful. In my case I chose to have counselling (via the NHS), led by someone experienced in helping neurodivergent clients:

The Autistic Survival Guide to Therapy

This book also taught me some important principles and enabled me to make some immediate, helpful changes - perhaps you might find it useful, too:

Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask!

Congratulations, I hope it gave you some answers and you find some closure. I’ve been diagnosed for just over a month. I’ve told two people outside of close family, to be honest family were very indifferent about it. I always remember the rule that you can’t untell someone, it’s hard to gauge what the reaction is going to be, if any.