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Autism and old people

abloner

Saying goodbye with some anguish and melancholy.

I launched in my micro possibilities a campaign on various sites in favor of some form of assistance for old age aspies .      Many of them have never been diagnosed, many of them don’t even know of the origins of their suffering. If they are so called high functioning, they may have thought, before the revelation, that they were “normal” people even as they had to go through an enormous amount of effort, and a constant feeling that there was something wrong, some sort of self deception and falsity in what they did, in their job and family life, if they had one, which rarely happens. They are normally single and loners. Fatigue was not a help in their  perception of their efforts. In a sense old aspies are left to manage their own winter by themselves. Wisdom is nowadays not commodity requested by society.

 Dependence is an act of begging, which not many can rely on for their insularity. At a certain age they normally have no more families or relatives. “Friends”, or, better, acquaintances disappear. An old aspie cannot protect anybody, and cannot receive protection. Are severe autistics in better condition? Donna Williams maintains that they are less desperate. I don’t know.

A blind, a deaf mute, a limp receive some assistance, if anything by the social services. Aspies are invisible.

 

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hope said:

    I think that it is hardest when you have asperger's in a very subtle way, when you don't 'look' disabled.

    I am very articulate, can speak fluently and expressively, smile, make eye-contact and have a 'normal' posture and gait. However, what goes on in my day to day life is a constant source of anxiety and irritation. I cannot sustain close and on-going relationships with people. I experience a nagging sense of boredom because I cannot make sense of the world or find meaning. I have a complicated set of rituals that must be performed every day, but they make me feel discontented and fed up. People and their emotions  do not make any sense to me. I have problems staying motivated and planning my life is very difficult for me. On top of these problems, I have many phobias and fears that consume my every waking hour.

    I might have what the clinicians call 'high functioning asperger's syndrome', but I do not really function well in terms of the things that neuro-typicals take for granted.  Most days I feel low and upset because of my difficulties, so I can relate to abloner even though I am of a different generation to his, age 24 years.  

    I'm closer  to Abloner's age but I can relate to everything Hope says here and what never seems to be acknowledged is  that it doesn't get better - not the basic difficulties.  One can adapt, fake, act and pretend but the underlying stress remains and as one gets older it becomes harder to cope.  I realise that's a very pessimistic thing to say but it's true.  Some of the physical problems caused by age can also make it harder for someone with AS to manage.

    I'm very lucky.  I have a partner.  He has never been diagnosed but he recognizes that he's on the spectrum, which doesn't always make the relationship easy and sometimes we have to work hard at it but at least we both have someone. 

     

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hope said:

    I think that it is hardest when you have asperger's in a very subtle way, when you don't 'look' disabled.

    I am very articulate, can speak fluently and expressively, smile, make eye-contact and have a 'normal' posture and gait. However, what goes on in my day to day life is a constant source of anxiety and irritation. I cannot sustain close and on-going relationships with people. I experience a nagging sense of boredom because I cannot make sense of the world or find meaning. I have a complicated set of rituals that must be performed every day, but they make me feel discontented and fed up. People and their emotions  do not make any sense to me. I have problems staying motivated and planning my life is very difficult for me. On top of these problems, I have many phobias and fears that consume my every waking hour.

    I might have what the clinicians call 'high functioning asperger's syndrome', but I do not really function well in terms of the things that neuro-typicals take for granted.  Most days I feel low and upset because of my difficulties, so I can relate to abloner even though I am of a different generation to his, age 24 years.  

    I'm closer  to Abloner's age but I can relate to everything Hope says here and what never seems to be acknowledged is  that it doesn't get better - not the basic difficulties.  One can adapt, fake, act and pretend but the underlying stress remains and as one gets older it becomes harder to cope.  I realise that's a very pessimistic thing to say but it's true.  Some of the physical problems caused by age can also make it harder for someone with AS to manage.

    I'm very lucky.  I have a partner.  He has never been diagnosed but he recognizes that he's on the spectrum, which doesn't always make the relationship easy and sometimes we have to work hard at it but at least we both have someone. 

     

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