• Replies 5 replies
  • Subscribers 84 subscribers
  • Views 382 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

How did you meet your partner (if you have one)?

Asparagus

I got together with an old friend on a night out, and it became serious very quickly (we were both in our 30s), now we’re married / kids etc 

before that, dating was very disappointing. I was either getting the ick from perfectly nice men and then unable to remain interested, or getting too intensely involved (now that we know I’m autistic, we know why!) and getting dumped in 3 months (but then having the exes contact me even after it was all over). It was always the wrong person, and I could never deal with the ambiguity and the game playing in early courtship 

I also could never tell if someone liked me and also tended not to like people if I knew they liked me  

For late diagnosed people - how did you get together with your partners? were the early days of dating difficult like it was for me eg emotional regulation, waiting for a text back etc 

Parents

  • I met my wife of 24 years when I was working in Brazil (as an IT contractor) and while I had no problem meeting local girls because I looked quite different to the locals (green eyes are a rarity there) I found the language barrier was a huge problem and any attempt to have a conversation didn't last long.

    A colleague (an English guy) had a Brazilian girlfriend who spoke English so I asked her if she knew of anyone who would be interested in a date. My criteria was they had to be intelligent and speak English. 

    A few days later we had a team meal in a posh restaurant on the rooftop of a skyscraper and I got me meet my date. It ended up a great chat, probably because the nuances that NTs can pick up on were masked by the cultural and language issues so we got on well and I asked her out on a second date.

    On the second date I was somewhat surprised by being nearly eaten alive by her in a restaurant which was a welcome surprise and quite a culture shock, and when I asked her to be my girlfriend after that she thought I was taking the Mickey as the locals would be typically noncommital so they could play the field for as long as possible - it is quite a promiscuous culture at times.

    However after confirming I was serious and chalking it up to a cultural difference we got on like a house on fire. She moved in with me about 5 months later when the apartment she was in was at end of lease and I had a place supplied by my employer. 6 months after that I had completed the project to upgrade all the Latin American sites IT ifrastructure so was returning to England so I asked her to marry me and the rest is history.

    We have travelled all around the world, worked in various countries and done a load of stuff, made mistakes (eg bankrupcy) but have done way more than I ever could have done by myself.

Reply

  • I met my wife of 24 years when I was working in Brazil (as an IT contractor) and while I had no problem meeting local girls because I looked quite different to the locals (green eyes are a rarity there) I found the language barrier was a huge problem and any attempt to have a conversation didn't last long.

    A colleague (an English guy) had a Brazilian girlfriend who spoke English so I asked her if she knew of anyone who would be interested in a date. My criteria was they had to be intelligent and speak English. 

    A few days later we had a team meal in a posh restaurant on the rooftop of a skyscraper and I got me meet my date. It ended up a great chat, probably because the nuances that NTs can pick up on were masked by the cultural and language issues so we got on well and I asked her out on a second date.

    On the second date I was somewhat surprised by being nearly eaten alive by her in a restaurant which was a welcome surprise and quite a culture shock, and when I asked her to be my girlfriend after that she thought I was taking the Mickey as the locals would be typically noncommital so they could play the field for as long as possible - it is quite a promiscuous culture at times.

    However after confirming I was serious and chalking it up to a cultural difference we got on like a house on fire. She moved in with me about 5 months later when the apartment she was in was at end of lease and I had a place supplied by my employer. 6 months after that I had completed the project to upgrade all the Latin American sites IT ifrastructure so was returning to England so I asked her to marry me and the rest is history.

    We have travelled all around the world, worked in various countries and done a load of stuff, made mistakes (eg bankrupcy) but have done way more than I ever could have done by myself.

Children
No Data