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Eye contact

Autismman

I don’t mind giving eye contact to those I know well like my family but it can be difficult or almost impossible when it’s strangers in a non scripted environment like perhaps people outside in the general public. Not that I would need to stare for prolonged amounts of time but I know there should be some almost unconscious natural interaction between people  even with just the eyes in their everyday lives. I also struggle to do this with a lot of my work colleagues predominantly managers but also a few colleagues, it seems selective to whether I have a firm enough grasp on who I think they are at their core and the general feeling or vibe I get from their being. If I find their topic of conversation boring or they don’t want to stop talking the eye contact becomes even less I have noticed. I am super aware of how little eye contact I give which in turn makes my anxiety worse because then I think everyone must think I’m weird, I just cannot connect to people very easily. The eyes are the windows to the soul and it definitely feels this way for me. Giving someone your eyes is like opening up a door to let others into your world and it’s a scary idea. Do others experience anything like this? I am diagnosed with ASD level 1 but trying to get an understanding of it so that maybe I can stop being so hard on myself. I am trying to remember to remember that a lot of autism is invisible and only felt inside oneself.

Parents

  • I concentrate on the eye itself rather than the person behind the eyes, I look at their colour, the way people have differnt flecks and rings of colour and the shape of the eye. I fi have to look at someone for a longish period of time I think about thier facial architecture, what could you tell from the underlying bone structure about gender, if you didn't know, about thier jaw line and cheek bones, the spacing of the nasal cavities etc as you would if you were going to reconstruct a face from a skull. I know its a bit weird, but it works for me. 

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  • I concentrate on the eye itself rather than the person behind the eyes, I look at their colour, the way people have differnt flecks and rings of colour and the shape of the eye. I fi have to look at someone for a longish period of time I think about thier facial architecture, what could you tell from the underlying bone structure about gender, if you didn't know, about thier jaw line and cheek bones, the spacing of the nasal cavities etc as you would if you were going to reconstruct a face from a skull. I know its a bit weird, but it works for me. 

Children
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