My wife and I went shopping in Glasgow this morning, and after the first two shops I had to stay outside – the noise and particularly the visual overload was simply overwhelming. As we talked about it later, we realized that five years ago I could have coped much better. Has anyone else noticed their sensory problems getting worse as you get older?
Your post is very timely for me, as for the last couple of hours I'm in a sustained complete sensory overwhelm and feeling a 10/10 anxiety level. I've babbled, I've been on the verge of tears, I can't focus on any of the tasks I came in to the office desperate to stay on top of. And why? I think it's just the layering of one sensory thing on top of another with no breathing space. Too much light in the office (summer), too much noise from the air-con roof machinery outside (summer again - open window grrr), slightly too warm (though thankfully the heatwave has passed but I'm not recovered from that either), my work lanyard is making direct skin contact with my neck because I wore a jumper instead of a shirt with collar today, the office has been unpredictably animated and noisy at various hard to anticipate points throughout the day, there's a feeling of agitation from colleagues tangibly in the air due to some unpredictable changes going on (and I'm unsettled as much as they are by the same, probably moreso) ... and to make matters worse, I'm having one of my extra-verbose days when I shouldn't be talking, but when I'm asked a question I start barelling along, constructing excurciating tangents on the fly as I go. And one background hyperfocus keeps pulling my concentration levels from barely there to non-existent. Put all these layers one on top of another and the result is total collapse. I even blurted out a short time ago that if anyone knew how little I'd done today I'd be sacked tomorrow. I said that to a manager-level colleague who, while not my line-manager, mut now have a terrible impression of my work ethic. I'm off-balance, over-sharing, inwardly and invisibly distressed... and I know that I coped with such not-uncommon circumstances way better in my 30s (I'm in my 40s now). And that was with less knowledge and fewer self-care coping strategies (dark glasses, earplugs, time-outs, breathing exercises, self-understanding from diagnosis) in place.
I can only assume that my energy reserves are even lower these days than they have tradtionally been (and I was alway a leaky battery to start with). I'm now an hour away from home-time, and the office is only beginning to ease down as the early birds leave in fits and starts. Will I manage to salvage something from the day and find an hour's redemptive concentration in the tank? Perhaps. Perhaps not. Either way, I'll go home drained, frustrated, edgy and guilty that I didn't just 'get a grip'... like that's so easy lol.
OK, even just typing that has taken my anxiety and overload down to a7/10, so thanks for the right thread at the right time, Wordsmith.:-) I hope your day improved after your own overwhelm with the shops...
Your post is very timely for me, as for the last couple of hours I'm in a sustained complete sensory overwhelm and feeling a 10/10 anxiety level. I've babbled, I've been on the verge of tears, I can't focus on any of the tasks I came in to the office desperate to stay on top of. And why? I think it's just the layering of one sensory thing on top of another with no breathing space. Too much light in the office (summer), too much noise from the air-con roof machinery outside (summer again - open window grrr), slightly too warm (though thankfully the heatwave has passed but I'm not recovered from that either), my work lanyard is making direct skin contact with my neck because I wore a jumper instead of a shirt with collar today, the office has been unpredictably animated and noisy at various hard to anticipate points throughout the day, there's a feeling of agitation from colleagues tangibly in the air due to some unpredictable changes going on (and I'm unsettled as much as they are by the same, probably moreso) ... and to make matters worse, I'm having one of my extra-verbose days when I shouldn't be talking, but when I'm asked a question I start barelling along, constructing excurciating tangents on the fly as I go. And one background hyperfocus keeps pulling my concentration levels from barely there to non-existent. Put all these layers one on top of another and the result is total collapse. I even blurted out a short time ago that if anyone knew how little I'd done today I'd be sacked tomorrow. I said that to a manager-level colleague who, while not my line-manager, mut now have a terrible impression of my work ethic. I'm off-balance, over-sharing, inwardly and invisibly distressed... and I know that I coped with such not-uncommon circumstances way better in my 30s (I'm in my 40s now). And that was with less knowledge and fewer self-care coping strategies (dark glasses, earplugs, time-outs, breathing exercises, self-understanding from diagnosis) in place.
I can only assume that my energy reserves are even lower these days than they have tradtionally been (and I was alway a leaky battery to start with). I'm now an hour away from home-time, and the office is only beginning to ease down as the early birds leave in fits and starts. Will I manage to salvage something from the day and find an hour's redemptive concentration in the tank? Perhaps. Perhaps not. Either way, I'll go home drained, frustrated, edgy and guilty that I didn't just 'get a grip'... like that's so easy lol.
OK, even just typing that has taken my anxiety and overload down to a7/10, so thanks for the right thread at the right time, Wordsmith.:-) I hope your day improved after your own overwhelm with the shops...
