Sometimes I feel surreptitiously motivated to produce art.
I often class art as one of my SI's, but I mostly only appreciate art.
Historically, I've felt demotivated about making things in general likely because I feel like there being a social reward to doing so is in some way required in order for me to be productive in this way.
I frequently fantasize about having had a clos-knit art friends while growing up so we would show each other our OC's, collaborate on some sort of shared world, talk about narratives, etc.
Lurking on DeviantArt, YT, Twitter, etc. helps me vicariously live that fantasy by assuming the artists posting stuff there have lives of that kind.
Aside from the lack of a social component to the creative process, the idea of being a unemployed, not college-educated, friendless, likely futureless adult causes me to feel like I'm wasting my time whenever I try creating art.
Do you feel somehow like that too, or can relate to anything in my exposition?