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Really struggling :(

chloes81

Hi guys I’m having a really really hard time at the moment

I’m undergoing diagnosis for Autism, I also have ADHD, fibromyalgia, a stomach problem, depression, anxiety IT GOES ON!

I’ve been off work with my asthma for 2 weeks - working from home for a week. As my my doctors note (work don’t really allow it)

I’m really really struggling with everything and I don’t know if it’s autism getting on top of me or just everything.

I woke up this morning and the thought of going to work had made me ball my eyes out for nearly a hour and nearly be sick because how much I’m cry, which then sets my asthma off!

It’s not that I don’t like my job, the job is okay I’ve been doing it from home it’s just the thought of going to work, leaving the house, being in an office with a load of people is literally making me have a breakdown and cry every morning.

I’ve told work I’m undergoing autism diagnosis and all the other issues I have but they don’t seem to understand.

I think I’m just going through a burnout but I have no idea what to do, I haven’t looked much into autism except the last year and I feel like it’s (I know it can’t) just getting worse and worse to the point I don’t even want to leave to go to work anymore it’s really effecting me.

  • Hello Chloe, I'm really sorry to hear about how tough things are for you at the moment.  You mentioned how stressed you feel about the prospect of being back in the workplace.  I've been reading that wearing Loop earplugs can help with sensory overwhelm, and wondered if they might make things a little easier for you if you have to be in the workplace?  The Engage 2 ones sound good because they allow you to have conversations with people, but reduce background noise, which apparently can help autistic people feel less tired and overwhelmed.  I really hope they might be helpful for you. If you sign up to their newsletter you'll get 10 % off. www.loopearplugs.com/.../engage-plus

  • Really sorry to read your post, sounds like a lot to deal with. I’ve struggled with anxiety/low mood for years and it’s takes its toll on your general health. Sounds like you need some time off work and try and recover a bit? Welcome btw….

  • I think it's stress. An assessment is a load of unknowns, you have to think about a lot of stuff you probably don't want to, you see new people and you don't know what the outcome will be. It is a big distraction, which if you are close to the edge anyway, is too much. Chuck in some other uncertainty or something you don't like, and your emotions become hard to control. This stops you sleeping which makes it all worse.

    Can you get some leave, even just a few days. Then try to do nothing or something you like. But have some rest and drink enough water.

  • Hi and welcome to the community. 

    Have you spoken to your doctor about how you are feeling? If not I'd suggest talking to them first, as they may be able to help with your mental health.

    Also have you spoken to your management about how going to the office is affecting you? Maybe you could arrange to work from home until you feel stronger. If they won't allow that, you may have to take some more sick leave until you are feeling better.

    I'm sorry I can't be more help and I wish you well.

  • Ive got IBS and fybro too as well as ASC, theres not a lot of help I can offer but just to say I get it.

  • Phew yeah, that sounds rough, Chloe. I also have ASD/ADHD/anxiety/depression and a few years ago had a horrible spell of pneumonia/asthma. I can imagine the stress of work only exacerbates the stomach issues and fibromyalgia!

    Definitely check out the links  shared (especially Dr. Anna Neff’s work, she’s fantastic!) and like she said, talk to your GP. I’d also add that if things feel like they are getting worse, then there is the possibility that it will eventually get better. If it’s really burnout and you manage to resolve that, then things might get better to a point where work doesn’t feel quite as daunting. Burnout isn’t forever (even if it feels like it)!

  • Hi and welcome to the community.

    I’m so sorry that you’re having such a hard time. I’d suggest contacting your GP for further support.

    Alongside that, you might find these NAS resources helpful, including the strategies suggested in the first one:

    NAS - Autistic fatigue and burnout

    NAS - Meltdowns

    There's also some great (free) advice here from Dr Megan Anna Neff - a neurodivergent author (who's also a clinician and advocate):

    Autistic Burnout Recovery: How to Build a Recovery Plan

    I've also just bought this new book of hers. It covers the subject in much greater detail, whilst remaining very user-friendly (including lots of diagrams and worksheets, for example):

    The Autistic Burnout Workbook: Your Guide to Your Personal Recovery Plan