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Late Self-Diagnosed, mislabeled in USA mental health system

SpectralGardener

Hi, All. I have self identified as a PDA autistic adult in recent months but here in the USA the land of the so called tax-avoidant autistic "burdens" who can't wipe their own bum because our parents were responsible enough to vaccinate us. Just a crazy autistic theory but maybe the so called "studies" that purported to link vaccines to autism if there really was a correlation was actually a result of increased critical thinking and cognitive ability because mum decided it was important to protect our brains from cognitive degeneration that childhood disease can lead to? I'm pretty sure the science already suggests viruses in childhood can cause brain damage and so maybe autism is simply just a brain with better critical thinking skills tuned to a different frequency that was protected from harmful childhood disease and is thus more attuned and we just are better tuned toward systemic balance when not forced into broken boxes that don't give us any real meaningful answers to our challenges because the disorder isn't autism at all but the system that forces us into boxes to protect the feelings of people who have pushed ableist narratives of inferiority at us out entire lives when in reality, cognitively we are the ones holding the actual truth society is to afraid to admit? Just my philosophical rantings from what feels like a revolving door of the Wall Street Yacht factory at the expense of everyones mental health.

Fun times over here across the pond...no actually its terrifying! Our DSM centric diagnostic models simply don't work, they drive pharmaceutical and insurance premium profits and they don't recognize PDA because its inconvenient and adds just another billing code to what feels analogous to poorly coded computer application that needs an enormous trove of guardrails to barely function. The DSM is flawed at its core from a cognitive and neural systems standpoint and I think its long overdue to be replaced with something more spectrally literate. The ICD is better than DSM but still struggles due to legacy system design siloed from modern cognitive and neural science. I am an ecologist so systems science is my language so to be pathologized from the outside-in felt like extreme observer bias that wouldn't fly in any other serious scientific field. This led me to wonder, is diagnostic psychology even an empirical science at all? Or is it an artifact of corporate exploitation of human health and as a system itself it has stabilized around a funding source that has locked it into stagnation of its core foundational systems because its not where the money is? Is what they call empirical science in their "gold standard" manuals that don't even recognize that cognition operates in recursive feedback loops as cognitive science has for a long time. It all just feels strangely analogous to an NPD shame loop on a collective macro level and the science as a whole has doubled down instead of admitting failure locking us into a loop of neurodivergent ableist societal micro-aggressions to keep our stories from being heard because they shut down the revenue stream a famous actor turned president created what I like to call "Fire Hose to the Top Econonmics", I guess the name they picked had a better ring than "trickle down, personal struggle shame loops". Well it worked, "trickle down economics" did exactly what it was meant to do, income inequality is soaring in the USA and worldwide because we all forgot how to talk to each other without assuming everyone else is an opponent to dominate or be dominated. We appear to be devolving back into apes in 2025 but hopefully that means we will be more empathetic than humans? I believe Jane Goodall would agree. There is always someone who wants to be the alpha but that doesn't mean we have to buy into the myths they spin to assert dominance, they are only able to manipulate if we enable it. I think its time for the autistic community to stand up to the systemic bullying we should not have to put up with anymore, I think right now in 2025 is our moment to have our voices heard more than any other time in history and it is our time to shine as our true authentic, awesomely autistic selves without having to conform to non-sense logic.

Just my opinions and philosophy, not trying to say I hold all the answers, nobody does and if my slight political lean into this conversation has offended anyone I am truly sorry as that is not my intent, this is just the authentic me, finally unmasked and over it all here across the Pond. I'd love to hear other autistic experiences and perspectives on these topics if this is appropriate? I have written an 8 page opinion peice that goes into more detail and I hope to start adding citations of empirical evidence to make the case for better diagnostic models with a better understanding of cognition. At least for now you can see the whole opinion piece I wrote on my google drive at the link below:

docs.google.com/.../edit

I'd love to hear the thoughts and perspectives from others in the broader autistic community if this resonates with them beyond those of us here in the USA and myself. I have a feeling its yes for most of us at least to some extent?

Cheers,

Spectral Gardener


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  • SpectralGardener said:
    and if my slight political lean into this conversation has offended anyone I am truly sorry as that is not my intent

    Pretty sure you’re not going to offend anyone if your agenda supports the betterment of Autistic lives lol. I have a post on this site where I mentioned RFK Jr’s insanity, but most people - even in UK - agree that guy’s a madman.

     The situation in the USA for Autism

     It’s nice to meet another American here on NAS. Hopefully things get better here in time.

  • in reply to profdanger

    Yes, thanks, I read your post too earlier! My theory is that RFK Jr. himself may be a repressed PDA/performance-perfectionist autistic — someone who was never told “no,” handed a tarnished silver spoon full of abusive wealth-entitlement theories as a child… or maybe just neglected entirely.

    It’s been a rough few years for me, and everything sort of culminated this past November when reality hit — and I finally realized that what I was always told was “just ADHD” was actually a far more complex and undiagnosable mix of AuDHD, RSD, C-PTSD, maybe dyslexia or bipolar, maybe even a dash of OCD or PDA. You name it.

    If that wasn’t enough, a couple of months ago I was hit with a faux diagnosis of narcissism — issued in absentia by my wife’s therapist. No evaluation. No context. No consent. No regard for the emotional harm of mislabeling someone with an identity that doesn’t fit. No acknowledgment that it might irreparably damage a relationship.

    And then, two hours later, I met with a diagnostic psychologist who reviewed my WAIS-IV and other ADHD testing from undergrad. I had waited months for this appointment. Within the first 10 minutes, she told me the scores indicated ADHD but not autism. When I asked why, she either avoided the question or didn’t know the answer. I started to wonder if she actually understood the data — or if she was just parroting earlier evaluators. I'm an ecologist and a highly attuned systems thinker — and what I heard didn’t add up.

    She told me, “ADHD isn’t a spectrum,” and that she was using “empirical” data. But I left with the sinking realization that this wasn’t the right kind of evaluation for what I actually needed. Not that I could have known in advance. This was what insurance was supposed to cover, right?
    Mental Health Care? Sure.

    Turns out, while there are good people in the field, psychology as an institution — in my opinion — has become (or maybe always was?) a hedge-funded Ponzi scheme of xenophobic comfort narratives masquerading as science.

    This isn’t a knee-jerk take. It’s my conclusion after over a decade of bouncing between in-network providers — most of whom either gaslit me, blamed me for “not committing,” or told me I just needed to “deal with my trauma.” About seven years ago, after an ADHD med consult, I failed a random drug test — from a poppy seed muffin I had that morning. I was told I had to attend substance abuse counseling in order to get ADHD medication I wasn’t even sure I wanted in the first place.

    I walked out and never looked back. That was an ADHD specialist.

    That was one of my early warning signs that the so-called “disorder” might be systemic in and of itself.

    It may be rigged — but I don’t believe all hope is lost. And with RFK Jr. back in the news for all the wrong reasons, maybe now is the perfect time to call the entire narrative’s bluff. Maybe this is the moment to expose the ironically narcissistic hypocrisy of the entire misdiagnosis-industrial complex — rooted in a biased, outside-in framework built for control, not understanding.

    I’m not mad at any one person. This is a collective blunder — the consequence of a system too scared to look in the mirror. But it is time to speak up and say: enough is enough.

    It’s time to stop letting corporate power structures define our identities as “dangerous” just because we threaten their exploitative psychoanalytic cash cow.

    The whole emotionally repressed clown show that is Washington’s political theatre right now? It’s just… sad. I feel for the puppets — from the top to the bottom — who were abused, sold a hollow version of “freedom,” and raised on the delusion that corporate personhood would equal progress without consequence.

    Well, here we are in 2025 — living the consequence. And yeah… it’s terrifying.

  • in reply to SpectralGardener

    I haven’t shared the same terrible experiences you have had with the health system, but I can understand why you are so wary of it. It sounds like you’ve been through a lot with that.

    However, that misdiagnosis of narcissism is HORRID. I haven’t been clinically misdiagnosed with that, but my own mother tossed in that word as an explanation for my behaviors once. Absolutely disgusting feeling, so I feel for you there. There’s a reason almost nobody gets diagnosed with that, or at least shouldn’t get diagnosed with that.

    I also went from around age 8/9 to age 30 being diagnosed with ADD, then finally receiving my diagnoses for ASD, ADHD, generalized anxiety, and major depressive. I think the problem was in my case people in my life were much more worried about my attention in the classroom than socialization with peers back in that day. I also don’t “look autistic,” so of course they weren’t going to screen me for that.

    SpectralGardener said:
    And with RFK Jr. back in the news for all the wrong reasons, maybe now is the perfect time to call the entire narrative’s bluff.

    Well said there. He does represent a complete breakdown of the system. If he’s in charge, there is something terribly wrong going on that is causing that. If there was ever a time to make a change, it’s while that clown is the leader.

Reply
  • in reply to SpectralGardener

    I haven’t shared the same terrible experiences you have had with the health system, but I can understand why you are so wary of it. It sounds like you’ve been through a lot with that.

    However, that misdiagnosis of narcissism is HORRID. I haven’t been clinically misdiagnosed with that, but my own mother tossed in that word as an explanation for my behaviors once. Absolutely disgusting feeling, so I feel for you there. There’s a reason almost nobody gets diagnosed with that, or at least shouldn’t get diagnosed with that.

    I also went from around age 8/9 to age 30 being diagnosed with ADD, then finally receiving my diagnoses for ASD, ADHD, generalized anxiety, and major depressive. I think the problem was in my case people in my life were much more worried about my attention in the classroom than socialization with peers back in that day. I also don’t “look autistic,” so of course they weren’t going to screen me for that.

    SpectralGardener said:
    And with RFK Jr. back in the news for all the wrong reasons, maybe now is the perfect time to call the entire narrative’s bluff.

    Well said there. He does represent a complete breakdown of the system. If he’s in charge, there is something terribly wrong going on that is causing that. If there was ever a time to make a change, it’s while that clown is the leader.

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