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Recently diagnosed - struggling

illustrated.lady

Hello!

I'm new here, I was diagnosed with 'high functioning autism' about 5 weeks ago, I just got my diagnostic report on Sunday.

I'm a 32 year old woman and never felt like I fit in, like I didn't connect with people and being around people drained me, sure, I can mask and say the right things and smile but it's all an act. I've always had issues in jobs and have had attendance issues and sick leave for stress in every job I've had. I've been on anti-depressants for ten years.

The diagnosis makes so much sense and I hope it will eventually allow me to be easier on myself and not so harsh on myself for struggling with things. I do feel like I'm struggling to come to terms with the diagnosis, it's a relief in some ways that there's a reason for my behaviors but it's also like....I don't know how to manage. I don't know how to get out of this cycle of stress and overwhelm and as I'm sure we're all aware, there's no support for autistic adults.

If you've read all of this then I sincerely thank you. I feel quite alone. 

Parents

  • I think the issue is there is no manual at the end to tell you how to do things, there is no life coach to tell what you should be or what you should do. You still have the problem of what to do with your life and how to manage.
    Just like with any other test it just gives you a result, that's all.

    But from the certainty, you can then plan.

    Of course you are likely to re-evaluate your life and possibly realise you've made mistakes and missed opportunities, which can be painful. But that will hopefully pass.

    There are various youtube vids which might help. There is probably something in here.

    80 Autism Accommodations You Don't Know About (But REALLY Need)

    25 Autism Accommodations You Didn't Know You Needed

    Autism Starter Kit for Newly Diagnosed Adults

    The key thing, which is my biggest issue, is trying to find a way to sleep well.

    With work, the thing I have finally realised at 56 is not to take it quite so seriously. I have always done more than everyone else, I am not sure why, and kept myself under pressure to overperform. The stress was mostly coming from me, I just needed to reframe it.

    You may be able to stop the anti-depressants. The depression is from overload or burnout, which they are not helping with. You probably will be better with a clearer head.

    I've always used alcohol, in moderation, but nonetheless as a means to relax and stop the knot in my chest, I have barely drunk this year which has not been easy. I also cut caffeine right down, was none for a month, and now just one coffee now and then. Both seems to have helped.

    Good luck. 

Reply

  • I think the issue is there is no manual at the end to tell you how to do things, there is no life coach to tell what you should be or what you should do. You still have the problem of what to do with your life and how to manage.
    Just like with any other test it just gives you a result, that's all.

    But from the certainty, you can then plan.

    Of course you are likely to re-evaluate your life and possibly realise you've made mistakes and missed opportunities, which can be painful. But that will hopefully pass.

    There are various youtube vids which might help. There is probably something in here.

    80 Autism Accommodations You Don't Know About (But REALLY Need)

    25 Autism Accommodations You Didn't Know You Needed

    Autism Starter Kit for Newly Diagnosed Adults

    The key thing, which is my biggest issue, is trying to find a way to sleep well.

    With work, the thing I have finally realised at 56 is not to take it quite so seriously. I have always done more than everyone else, I am not sure why, and kept myself under pressure to overperform. The stress was mostly coming from me, I just needed to reframe it.

    You may be able to stop the anti-depressants. The depression is from overload or burnout, which they are not helping with. You probably will be better with a clearer head.

    I've always used alcohol, in moderation, but nonetheless as a means to relax and stop the knot in my chest, I have barely drunk this year which has not been easy. I also cut caffeine right down, was none for a month, and now just one coffee now and then. Both seems to have helped.

    Good luck. 

Children
  • in reply to Stuart333

    Hello!

    Thank you for the videos.

    My sleep is not good, I'm not totally sure why but I put off going to sleep and I have a really bad habit of going on my phone in bed. 

    I am making a request to reduce my workload which will hopefully help so I can go to work, do what I can, go home and not think about it. 

    I'm not sure about anti-depressants, they're so hard to come off, I tried a few times in the past and it was awful!