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Addiction

Helpfulgran

Good evening. I am new to this site, and my question is how we deal our grandson 25 who has Asperger Syndrome and has an addiction to scratch cards and internet gambling sites. Apparently no amount of talking to him makes any differnce. His mum thinks she has sorted it out for him and just continues. His mum is at the end of her tether, as she struggles to make ends meet. He realises that he mustn't do this, but obviously its an addiction, and I do realize that he is not going to be able to do this just like that. His mother has never had any help (to my knowledge) or advise or any support of anykind in regard to Autsim. (Until he was 20 years old,) when he used to get very distressed around people and would shout to people in the street if they were looking at him. (That is only one example.  BUT at the moment the overriding problem at the moment is the gambling.    Sorry I am rambling.  

Parents

  • Hi helpfulgran,

     My heart goes out to you. I come from a family with a history of ASD and in my experience addiction, impulsive and high risk behaviour and obsessions can play a prominant part in the lives of some (not all) on the spectrum. My own son also has ASD & substantial money management issues and his constant demands have also placed a good deal of strain on our family.

    We struggle to convince him that their is no money tree growing in the garden and to get him to value the little money he has, but as you say it truly is a battle. We have approached Autism Sussex for money management advice and managed to get one session with the citizens advice bureau, but truthfully a more tailored programme is needed for our son and i'm told their is no help available in our area, only In West Sussex.

    In a bid to help him we've also looked for CBT councellers experienced in ASD to try and support him, but sadly, we have none in our area. Our nearest was over 80 miles round trip.

    I have appointeeship for my son, which does allow some flexibility, but i suspect that legal advice will be needed in the future as he gets older, to ensure he isn't taken advantage of, or looses his money by mismanagement. I divide his allowance between three areas, personal allowance, emergency support and incidentals, this helps prevent him from blowing the entire amount within the day (and yes that has happened) Incidentals are for everyday things he fails to take account of like transport, repairs, treatment etc, but the responsibility is not one I enjoy and is stressful in itself.

    Like your daughter, I've struggle greatly and feel it's an area of real need. I'd like my sons to be as independant as possible, but with a barrier such as this it takes away one of the fundemental elements for them. I'd love a mentor/advisor for him in this area, but have struggle to find any tailored support. I know this is of little help to yourself, but I think it's important to know that their are others like your daughter out their with similar problems.

    I'm not sure of the area you live, but it may be a good idea to ring the NAS helpline and see which are the nearest Autisim services to yourself. You may have better luck than me. Also see if you can find a CBT professional experienced in ASD, to help your grandson. My son responds much more positively to support from third parties and I feel sure he'd benefit from CBT, but sadly we cannot seem to find anyone close. You may have better luck.

    I wish you all the best I know how stressful it all is.

    Take care

    Coogybear.

Reply

  • Hi helpfulgran,

     My heart goes out to you. I come from a family with a history of ASD and in my experience addiction, impulsive and high risk behaviour and obsessions can play a prominant part in the lives of some (not all) on the spectrum. My own son also has ASD & substantial money management issues and his constant demands have also placed a good deal of strain on our family.

    We struggle to convince him that their is no money tree growing in the garden and to get him to value the little money he has, but as you say it truly is a battle. We have approached Autism Sussex for money management advice and managed to get one session with the citizens advice bureau, but truthfully a more tailored programme is needed for our son and i'm told their is no help available in our area, only In West Sussex.

    In a bid to help him we've also looked for CBT councellers experienced in ASD to try and support him, but sadly, we have none in our area. Our nearest was over 80 miles round trip.

    I have appointeeship for my son, which does allow some flexibility, but i suspect that legal advice will be needed in the future as he gets older, to ensure he isn't taken advantage of, or looses his money by mismanagement. I divide his allowance between three areas, personal allowance, emergency support and incidentals, this helps prevent him from blowing the entire amount within the day (and yes that has happened) Incidentals are for everyday things he fails to take account of like transport, repairs, treatment etc, but the responsibility is not one I enjoy and is stressful in itself.

    Like your daughter, I've struggle greatly and feel it's an area of real need. I'd like my sons to be as independant as possible, but with a barrier such as this it takes away one of the fundemental elements for them. I'd love a mentor/advisor for him in this area, but have struggle to find any tailored support. I know this is of little help to yourself, but I think it's important to know that their are others like your daughter out their with similar problems.

    I'm not sure of the area you live, but it may be a good idea to ring the NAS helpline and see which are the nearest Autisim services to yourself. You may have better luck than me. Also see if you can find a CBT professional experienced in ASD, to help your grandson. My son responds much more positively to support from third parties and I feel sure he'd benefit from CBT, but sadly we cannot seem to find anyone close. You may have better luck.

    I wish you all the best I know how stressful it all is.

    Take care

    Coogybear.

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