Hi I am new to this group. I have a 6 year old little boy who is on the pathway to an adhd/autism diagnosis. His adhd is very obvious with the hyperactivity impulsiveness etc. Recently I have been wondering if I am an autistic/adhd myself. I know the symptoms can range, but here are a few things that make me wonder. I used to be petrified of loud noises as a child but I did grow out of that. I like to wear the same outfits all the time. I struggle with change of routine. I feel like giving eye contact is intense and I have to look away for a little while then look again whilst giving eye contact. My brain never stops with random thoughts, I literally can’t stop it thinking to the point it massively frustrates me. In school I was shy but always daydreaming in class. I feel like I maybe have a bit of social anxiety, it almost feels like people are watching me sometimes I can’t relax and be myself. I have had ocd since a child where I have had to stop bad things happening by repeating stuff, some days I can’t wear certain socks or clothes if fixed to a thought that something bad will happen, I’ve had jumpers sat in my wardrobe for ages because of this. When music comes on I find it hard to stop my brain daydreaming I have to concentrate to not let it. As a teenager I would repeatedly walk round my house in circles daydreaming whilst listening to music I did this over a long period. Sometimes I can’t wear certain find it overwhelming if my partner touches me, I love him but maybe find it a bit overwhelming. I can fixate and ruminate on my mistakes bad things that have happened and I can do this for years on the same thing. I often look for inspiration from other women with clothes, I have no real sense of self, if I see someone really cool I will want to be just like them in every way. I can be emotionally dysregulated, I can have a bad day and think I just want to die (id never do anything like that) but just what goes through my head occasionally. I have been on antidepressants before. I beat myself up in my head a lot I can either be really nice or really harsh on myself. I struggle being out of routine, my little one isn’t in school at the moment and I feel up until I had my baby I always worked and knew my routine but I would say my mental health has struggled more not having that set routine. I can be sensitive to rejection, feeling not invited or wanted can really hurt and I can fixate on that or the people for a while and i don’t want to. I can get obsessions about people to, not going near them but just in my head even when I don’t want to it’s strange.
I have no idea if this is autism or adhd but just wondered whether it was worth exploring it as I do struggle with my mental health and just wondered if this could be the answer to help me.
