Hi everyone, I’m very new here and diagnosed autistic 5 weeks ago at age 25. I thought it would feel relieving getting the diagnosis but I’ve only felt hatred about it since getting it. Is that normal? I don’t know any other autistic people and I’m feeling very alone with it. Please help!
I also got my diagnose very late and after a few months it does start to get better.
sometimes you have to start to understand what it means first and then maybe people will be more comapssioanite.
Well that's my thoughts and i apologise for my spelling
Welcome! I'm a similar age to you and was diagnosed a bit earlier. I felt really alone after the diagnosis....It took a lot of time to process everything. It's a lot to take in all at once, try to give yourself time to process everything. What you're going through is absolutely normal and you are definitely not alone.
Stick around here, there's a lot of good people who understand and have felt similar to you. I first posted here yesterday and have received so much help. For once, I finally feel understood and like I really belong in this world.
I actively sought a diagnosis at 59 years of age. After being made aware that I might be autistic, I researched adult autism to an obsessive extent. I became convinced that being autistic was the best fit for how I am, and answered a lot of questions concerning various problems, some minor, some less so, that I have always had. I felt that my conviction needed validation, for my peace of mind, so I had a considerable amount of psychological investment in getting a positive diagnosis. After receiving a diagnosis of ASD my reaction was essentially one of relief. My feelings about It have remained mostly positive. Though I have some regrets about missed opportunities in my past, due to being an undiagnosed autistic, I have found that knowing that I am autistic has allowed me to forgive myself for not living up to my ideal picture of what I should be (influenced by unrealistic perfectionism, no doubt).
I was diagnosed 1 year ago now and I've had a very varied time with my diagnosis.
I haven't told hardly anyone and can't bring myself to talk about it or bring it up, so only people very close to me know.
The biggest thing I've been taken aback by, is after telling people and the pressure and buildup, they say things like, well year, I always knew there was something, and we're all a bit autistic, so don't worry.
These are very disheartening responses for me and I really don't want to tell everyone for this reason, and I don't want extra attention or sympathy from people.
I do feel a sense of shame from the diagnosis and struggle with accepting that it's all true. It was definitely easier for me before I knew for sure, because I could convince myself that it may not be and could be something else. And without that, I feel lost, unsure and struggle to accept the reality.
I was diagnosed a couple or so years ago in my fifties - so you’re not that late! It takes time to process the diagnosis for many people, so give it time and you might find that you get more comfortable with it in time.
Hi Bell20 welcome to the community. I haven't had a formal diagnosis myself but on discovery I went through a range of emotions but not fully able to explain really as I am not so good with emotions...it did not leave me feeling good. From my experience it has improved over time and with support, I have the NAS community personally very helpful. Its a good way to understand more about autism and engage/relate to people who share similar experiences/stories.
Congratulations on your diagnosis and welcome to the community!
You're far from alone in feeling that way. After diagnosis, it can be common for us - especially as late-diagnosed adults - to experience a lot of emotional dysregulation. Besides feeling relief about getting our diagnosis, this can also include working through a phase where we experience confusion and/or (backward-focused) anger, frustration, grieving and more.
The NAS has a great set of articles focused on "after diagnosis", including one covering how you might feel during the subsequent days / weeks / months. You might find them of interest and/or helpful:
NAS - How you might feel after a diagnosis
NAS - Other advice covering post-diagnosis including:
As for many others here, my own diagnosis turned out to be the start of a new journey, rather than a conclusion full of instant solutions for my ASD-related difficulties.
Therapy (or counselling) is often recommended after a diagnosis, as a follow up action for your GP to arrange. In anticipation of that, you might find it helpful to borrow or buy this book, which includes discussion of various types of therapy and counselling, together with advice on choosing the right therapist or counsellor - all from an autistic person's viewpoint. Several of us here have found it very helpful:
I understand there is a lot to cope with when receiving a diagnosis. A lot of people report denial or grief knowing their lives might not be the way they planned, but if you embrace it, people will love you for the real you. Neurodiversity is being talked about more and more, people are coming to understand, accept and make accommodations in places like work and events.
I spent so many years in denial about mine, ten years to be exact, yet now I've come to embrace it my life has changed for the better. I look back now and wish I'd been honest with people, told them about my diagnosis instead of tried to hide it, because now I'm faced with a load of people who don't know the real me.
My advice would be to research, find out as much as you can about autism and try to relate it to yourself. The more you find out, the more it makes sense the reason why things might happen the way they do. For example, I was trying to pay for food today and three people were talking to me at once. I asked them to stop because it was too much information, to which they did. Before I would've tried to battle through that situation because I never understood why it was so difficult to process it all. Once you understand yourself, you can advocate for yourself.
