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I don't have any autistic friends

KL

Hello everyone I am taking a break from social media but I am trying to connect more to people here. I find that there are some toxic people out there who know how to hurt me when I am vulnerable so I have to distance myself from them. I'm really sad at the moment but I still need to interact with people other than my husband. Not that there's anything wrong with him but he's my person and I don't want to always put everything on him. I tried to post yesterday but I guess my post didn't go through. 

Parents

  • I use instagram and although it’s too much, I like it because the algorithm sends me posts which I like - science, technology, language related posts, space etc. so I like sitting there and reading or watching it. I also love Videos from production processes. I have fun there and a friend who I hang out with sometimes. But otherwise I don’t care about social media and trends there,  don’t care about showing myself in a way that I seem cool to NTs etc. I have few autistic online friends, met in forums, but in real life I have no friends. I have one friend abroad, she is my long term friend for nearly 2 decades, she is not autistic, but we used to get on really well in the past. Now it’s kind of toxic and idk hard to explain. I have my husband and daughter and also have absolutely 0 friends where we are living. I go out to the playground with my daughter and feel like a total outcast among other parents who sit, chat, laugh etc, but I can’t. Sometimes I get weird stares from other parents or even kids when I sit and stim and it reminds me of those times when I was bullied as a kid. I get anxious about going to the playground but I do it for my daughter. I would like to get some help in social interactions but I’m not sure if I ever get it. 

  • in reply to Alien0n3arth

    Hi, I’m not on the spectrum, but I’m here for a family member. Just wanted to assure you that I don’t have many friends either! I actually enjoy my solitude. Don’t feel like the world ends if you don’t have friends; I find more peace in my own company, doing art, than I would with a thousand friends. I’m just a normal person, but let me tell you, many people can be toxic, so don’t stress. Find something you love to do in your free time. Art is incredibly helpful—painting is relaxing and enjoyable.

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  • in reply to Alien0n3arth

    Hi, I’m not on the spectrum, but I’m here for a family member. Just wanted to assure you that I don’t have many friends either! I actually enjoy my solitude. Don’t feel like the world ends if you don’t have friends; I find more peace in my own company, doing art, than I would with a thousand friends. I’m just a normal person, but let me tell you, many people can be toxic, so don’t stress. Find something you love to do in your free time. Art is incredibly helpful—painting is relaxing and enjoyable.

Children
  • in reply to Lotus

    Hi Lotus, I have plenty of friends I could spend time with, but I may not have explained my thoughts well. Even though I have many friends, there are times when I prefer to be alone. I genuinely enjoy solitude. It’s been about 3 to 4 months since I’ve seen most of my friends, and honestly, I don’t mind at all. Not sure if I’m still on the spectrum.

  • in reply to Sherry

    Hi Sherry and welcome.

    Just wanted to say, I believed I was "just a normal person" too, until I did the AQ50 test online and scored 42 out of 50 and realised I was a "normal person" who just happened to be on the autism spectrum. And If you have an autistic family member, you have a higher chance of being on the spectrum yourself, as a genetic link has been proven.

    I would be interested to know your AQ score if you're happy to take the test, as I am keen to know if there really are allistic (non autistic) people who aren't bothered about having friends. I've always believed that it was only autistic people who felt like that, because not having friends is seen as one of the main traits of autism. Maybe you are an exception to the rule though?