Advice!!

I still hate phone calls and I remember well when it felt so bad I just couldn't do them, so I sympathise. It took a lot of experience and time to force myself to become better at them. What I used to do was plan out the whole conversation in my head - but both sides of the conversation, with all the various permutations and possibilities. All it did was help me procrastinate indefinitely and get nowhere, because you can't possibly plan out anything like that when half of the conversation is out of your control.

So although others have suggested planning a script, what I do now is decide what the very first thing to say is. In a phone call to something like a GP or a call centre, it's usually going to be explaining why you called in the first place. Once that is firm in my head, I then have to trust that it becomes a question/answer back and forth, so I'm just responding to the person's next statement/question. And usually this is fine, the biggest fear for me is the initial interaction - once I'm past that I'm committed and I just have to keep going, and I find it was never as bad as I first thought.

If there are things you feel like you definitely want to say or get across, perhaps plan those out beforehand too so that when the time comes to respond (or you feel like there is a point where it should be brought up), you know what to say and don't have the pressure of being put on the spot. Ultimately I've found (in my own experience - others may feel differently) that you just can't plan out everything so prepare for one or two statements, and then respond to whatever comes next. It sounds scary, yet the other person really won't be as scary as you think.

I hope it goes well for you.

Hi and welcome to the community!

I've found that preparing a script (or at least a list / bullet points of things to discuss and ask) can definitely help with GP phone calls. 

In addition to reading this article:

NAS - Signs that a child or adult may be autistic

You might also find this resource helpful; it includes a download with a list of suggested questions that you can ask your GP when requesting an assessment:

NAS - How to request an autism assessment

If you live in England, you might particularly like to read about requesting an assessment via Right to Choose (which enables access to private providers who might have shorter waiting lists than the NHS, but with your referral and assessment still fully funded by the NHS).

Some examples of Right to Choose providers are listed here, for example:

ADHD and ASD assessment – Right To Choose

The NAS articles include links to some screening questionnaires that you might like to complete, to get a better idea of whether your suspicions might be correct. However, you might prefer to use the website below for this, rather than the versions linked in the NAS article.

The site below provides some very useful commentary for each questionnaire, and also enables them to be completed online (with scores calculated for you), saved as PDFs and - if the results support your suspicions - printed off to share with your GP.

The AQ-10 or AQ-50 seem to be the most frequently used / required by GPs in support of NHS referrals, so I'd suggest completing at least the AQ-10 and having the results ready to discuss during your phone call. (RAADS-R might also be helpful, although some recent research has thrown doubt on its validity as a screening tool). 

Embrace Autism - screening tests

I wish you the best of luck with your call.

Thank you, If this doesn’t work I might speak to my university as I’ve been told they can support me with being referred! Which does give me some sort of hope, but yes I am definitely going to try my best to not be too upset if my gp doesn’t take me seriously as last time i tried speaking to them i was put on antidepressants (awful decision)! But thank you!! 

To add to Iain’s advice, if the worst comes to the worst and your GP isn’t understanding of your situation and won’t refer you, it isn’t the end of the world because you can call back another time and explain that you weren’t happy with not being taken seriously or whatever reason you feel you need to give. You are entitled to be properly heard and taken seriously. Just remember that your future potential diagnosis does not depend on the one phone call tomorrow, so do try to take the pressure off yourself. Good luck with your telephone call.

Thank you so much!! This has honestly helped me so much! :-) 

Start with the headlines of what you want as an outcome - eg "I want a referral to be assessed for autism".

Then explain why "I have observed my traits that are in line with those used as criteria for the diagnosis. They are as follows".

There is a good reference on this site for this:

https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/diagnosis/before-diagnosis/signs-that-a-child-or-adult-may-be-autistic

write down all that apply and mark them as minor, medium or severe.

Email this to them if possible otherwise when you call tell him you have issues in social interaction and can you read the letter out that you have prepared, then read the one you just wrote.

If you can email it then this will save havng to read it all out.

Simple, effective and you get to keep the list for your assessment as well,