Problems with manager at work - they called me pedantic

Hi all, 

I was diagnosed almost a year ago at 28 years old! I have always struggled in life but never knew why. Since being diagnosed I changed jobs and let my manager and colleagues know that I am autistic and have ADHD as well as mental health issues derived of these + 28 years of being misdiagnosed as anxiety.

Today I had an argument with my manager. They are very difficult to work with (many people agree with me!) and they want things done a certain way. Today they accused me of not doing something just because I did it in a way that worked for me but not for them. The task was done and when I tried to explain this they refused to listen which lead to me starting to raise my voice a bit and my manager calling me pedantic and saying that as I am in working hours and they are my manager I have to do as they ask. I found this extremely unprofessional and rude (also my manager was the pedantic one not me!) I said I didn't understood their comment or why I was supposedly being pedantic and they ignored my question. I am very offended and led to me having a meltdown. I don't know if I'm overreacting as sometimes things that should offend me don't provoke any reactions and things that are meant to be a joke offend me deeply. What does everyone think? Thanks!

Parents
  • Hi, So sorry to hear your boss has not followed their legal duty of care to support you. I'd don't think they should have been unreasonable towards you. They are responsible for ensuring you are not disadvantaged because of your diagnosis, this is a legal requirement of theirs if they know it or not. It's called 'Unfavourable treatment' a discrimination.

    You got the job done, you completed the objective, so long as it was safe, did not take longer, use more resources etc - they have the problem, possibly a bit too controlling it sounds.

    It is a shame we have to do all we can to protect ourself with NT generally not understanding, and particularly when NT bosses, don't bother to understand. Extremely frustrating. Something that could help in the futures, is to request clear instructions are emailed to you, then you have evidence to help protect yourself. All sounds '***', but I have found this helpful for a need to help protect myself from discrimination. Hope this helps.

    Happy for anyone to correct me here please.

Reply
  • Hi, So sorry to hear your boss has not followed their legal duty of care to support you. I'd don't think they should have been unreasonable towards you. They are responsible for ensuring you are not disadvantaged because of your diagnosis, this is a legal requirement of theirs if they know it or not. It's called 'Unfavourable treatment' a discrimination.

    You got the job done, you completed the objective, so long as it was safe, did not take longer, use more resources etc - they have the problem, possibly a bit too controlling it sounds.

    It is a shame we have to do all we can to protect ourself with NT generally not understanding, and particularly when NT bosses, don't bother to understand. Extremely frustrating. Something that could help in the futures, is to request clear instructions are emailed to you, then you have evidence to help protect yourself. All sounds '***', but I have found this helpful for a need to help protect myself from discrimination. Hope this helps.

    Happy for anyone to correct me here please.

Children
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