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Not autistic diagnosis

notthatmuchautistic

Hello,

This morning I have my diagnosis from NHS. they told me that while I have autistic traits and they understand why I would pursuit an assessment, I didn't  make the criteria for a diagnosis, they mention specially my empathy and my facial expressions, that are normal.

I don't  know how to feel. I have a child with autism and our similarities was what made me search for an evaluation.

At the moment, I have some accommodations at my job that are in place under the premise that I am undergoing the process of autism diagnosis. Those adaptations have made my life much easier  and I don't  want to cry every day when I am going to my job (like before).

I am guessing  that once my job knows that I don't  have autism I am losing  that help and I don't  know what to do.

I don't  want to be the kind of person that take advantage  of the system and have benefits  that doesn't  need, but I do struggle and now I don't know what to do next.

I hope this post doesn't  offend people with autism, I know this forum  is for the autistic community and I am not sure if I should  post.

Parents

  • I think that for people who mask heavily, the trick is to explore the things that your assessor might get wrong from just observation within the questionnaire you fill in yourself. I appear to make 'normal' eye contact, but I do it consciously, not in the unconscious neurotypical way (I time it). I appear to converse 'normally' most of the time, but I highlighted occasions when my close family members did not pick up on my intent because my tone of voice or facial expression did not convey my mood accurately. 

  • in reply to Martin

    For me eye contact is problematic too. Sometimes it feels like someone is penetrating my souls, sometimes not. I don’t know why. As a child I didn’t look others in the eyes. I was told i have to do it (not explained why although I asked) then I started staring people very intense and I got a message to stop doing it. So as a result I’m confused what I actually should do. Currently I avoid or do very short eye contact with strangers and at home I usually skip it, but sometimes I also stare at my closest ones until they look me back. If I’m stressed I can’t do any eye contact at all, I dont even remember about it. 

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  • in reply to Martin

    For me eye contact is problematic too. Sometimes it feels like someone is penetrating my souls, sometimes not. I don’t know why. As a child I didn’t look others in the eyes. I was told i have to do it (not explained why although I asked) then I started staring people very intense and I got a message to stop doing it. So as a result I’m confused what I actually should do. Currently I avoid or do very short eye contact with strangers and at home I usually skip it, but sometimes I also stare at my closest ones until they look me back. If I’m stressed I can’t do any eye contact at all, I dont even remember about it. 

Children
  • in reply to A

    Sometimes I have some sort of distorted perception of others and I actually see them like kind of objects and stare them and observe some details on their bodies like pimples or skin wrinkles or someone who is overweight. Then I feel kind of ashamed for doing it but I know it’s only me who knows what’s going on in my head. But sometimes I fear that others hear my thoughts or wonder if I only thought that or said that. Sometimes also say my thoughts in a whisper or repeat in whisper parts of conversations I hear. It’s echolalia. It also makes me feel uncomfortable. There are so many things that make me avoid or limit contacts with others. 

  • in reply to Noone

    The way I explain it is it feels like I’m touching someone inappropriately. 

    As an adult I have learned to do it, but it makes me about as uncomfortable as if I was groping someone.