Don't meet the criteria

Just a quick thought - did your GP do the paperwork correctly?

I have a letter from a nearby (and poorly run hospital) stating they didn't have enough evidence to support the referral for an ASD assessment. However, I also had my Right to Choose (RTC) put through on the strength of the AQ10 (a 10-question survey) with a score of 9. Basically, someone at my GP surgery messed up twice. Firstly by putting my paperwork through to the hospital, but secondly not including the AQ10 or any of the observation notes to support the referral.

So if it is just a letter regarding the referral process, it might be worth advocating for yourself. If you take the AQ10 and/or AQ50 and score well into the areas that suggest seeking further advice, push the GP for a referral.

I mention it only on the off chance.

I am in the same boat. I will also make a post about this. It seems to be that many people fall through the cracks, by masking too much [just what I did]. Especially women, who are hard to diagnose. We need to find out why the NHS is so rigid and has such a weird way of diagnosing adult females. 

I’m sorry to hear that you received this news, please remember self diagnosis is very valid and if you know that your autistic then you accommodate for yourself and don’t let a letter put you off 

This sounds like a really difficult thing to process I hope you’re ok and that you have plans and people in place to support you. Just because you haven’t met the criteria I wouldn’t say you’re not autistic the criteria and assessments aren’t perfect and I know those assigned female at birth get missed in the diagnosis process. If you have done extensive research and feel you are I think that’s valid and I welcome you to the community with open arms.  You could request a second opinion or when you get your written report you could question certain points and why they came to their conclusion if those are options you feel confident pursing.

This sounds like awfully hard to me. Did you just do the initial testing or the full test?

Did they speak to someone to find and out any information? If they did this sometimes inaccurate information can be given out. For example, I was never tested but they just spoke to my mum at first who said I was never unwell in my childhood etc etc loads more inaccurate. The hospital knew I was autistic. Then, case closed due to a parent misleading info perfect no ill health. Right, hospital continued treating as an autitistic everyone knew....left applied again as told too autistic too vulnerable etc. Got to screening this time left my mum out went to get my medical records and I was shocked and in it I saw at just two months I was in hospital sick with an infection and got anti biotic and was unwell through to two years old back and forewards and never ahead because of the wrong information. I then sailed through the rest and got through to testing and was diagnosed many level 2 moderate. I attached an image to show it is all true and how can my parent forget that. They spoke to my dad as well who verfied things, but no mum who cannot stand any disabilities.

You can always go private as well if you save.

If it is not to be though I say try and forget and walk away from autism if you are not. There are disadvantages to it as well. Just be yourself. Also, there is just sensory processing disorder.

SJade said:

I've just had a letter saying that I don't meet the criteria for a diagnosis of autism

Did you get the scores from the tests you would have taken from the assessment process?

These would have been multiple choice type questions.

These should help show if you have autistic traits but that they do not impact you enough to merit the diagnosis since the diagnosis is effectively a label of being disabled by your traits.

Autism, or more accurately neurodiversity, is a spectrum and you can be anywhere on that curve with some traits at some level. Just because they are not enought to make you disabled does not mean you are not suffering and need help like the rest of us.

So hang about, find out about the traits that cause you problems and interact with us about these and generally be a part of the community. You will be welcome with open arms

Hi SJade,

Stick around here - you are most welcome.

Hi and welcome to the community! I already heard around half year ago (not official diagnosis, but psychotherapy) that in fact I’m “a little bit autistic”, but I’m married and have a child and I dont have struggles and not having friends is not a problem. I changed therapist. This one I have now has found the reason why I have so much stress and understands me and my problems and he said he knows many autistic people some of them are also married and have children. I’m not sure if I pursue a diagnosis or not, for years I had to hide in bathrooms at work to cry it out but had no idea what and why. Only from this therapist I found out i have difficulties recognising my own emotions and states which leads to taking more than I can. But according to some people I’m just a hysterical childish idiot and they never take me seriously. As for diagnosis- there are two factors, the traits that are present and their impact on your life. Unfortunately it’s not fully objective, as one assessor may say that you are not struggling enough, other one may say that you do fall under the criteria. I hope you find connections and support here.

Hi SJade and welcome. 

Where do you go? Nowhere, please stay here and talk with us.

I'm a woman in my sixties and "self discovered" that I was autistic when I was in my fifties. After much consideration and hearing stories like yours (on this forum) I decided not to pursue an assessment. I saw in another thread that you said you can communicate and do banter and that you are married, which is the reason they gave, and I am the same. After 5 decades of observing, copying, studying social sciences and asking people for clarification about what they think, I'm quite good at acting neurotypical, so it's not easy for others to see or to understand how I sometimes struggle.

Be reassured that everyone is welcome here, diagnosed or not.

Thank you this is helpful 

Hello, welcome to the forum 

I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling lost right now, it’s incredibly frustrating to spend so much time researching and finally feeling like you’ve found an answer, only to be told you don’t meet the criteria. It’s important to remember that diagnostic criteria, especially for autism, can sometimes fail to capture the experiences of adults and women, as it often presents differently. Women tend to mask more; and this can make it difficult if you had been heavily masking during your assessment. Just know that this outcome doesn’t invalidate the struggles or traits you’ve identified in yourself.

From here, you might want to ask for feedback from the assessment service, and check if they took everything you said into account. There may be a particular reason why they couldn’t diagnosis you, such as enough information about your childhood. So once you know what the reason was, you could work on getting more evidence that could change the outcome. It might also be worth having a chat with your GP and seeking a second opinion. Or you can focus on what you’ve learned about yourself and use strategies and supports that align with your needs, whether or not you have a formal diagnosis.

Can I ask, how was you assessed, webcam or in person? What provider assessed you? Do you feel you shared everything you felt was relevant that could be associated to autism? Sometimes traits overlap with other conditions, such as ADHD, could your traits more closely align with another condition?