Hi all, just wanted to write in with a story about not being diagnosed and my ultimate frustration with my assessment. At the end, my assessor confirmed that I was 'definitely neurodiverse', but despite the social problems I reported having, I had gotten on the 'wrong horse' and needed an ADHD assessment. I'm alright with going for an ADHD diagnosis and fully believe that I also have that, but the assessor made a number of flippant comments, such as:
- I cited being unable to see the 'grey' areas, and finding a lot of benefit in therapy to be able to see other points of view; the assessor told me that ASD folks can't see the grey area
- I cited video games as being one of my special interests; the assessor commented that 'video games are not a traditional autistic special interest, the dopamine release is more indicative of ADHD'
- successfully having two long term friendships apparently also disqualifies me for ASD!
I do think that my ADHD traits tend to hide the social ASD struggles that I feel. People are willing to overlook when I go nonverbal at intense outings if the rest of the time I'm usually bubbly and outgoing, or think it's just me being a b*tch when I get overstimulated and very snappy and angry. I score abysmally low on tests involving empathy (and expressing it day-to-day), but because therapy helps me, I'm not autistic. I've played the same 20-30 story-based video games on repeat my entire life, but that's not an autistic special interest...
The lack of diagnosis was disheartening, but realising I have to sit in another queue for an ADHD assessment was even more disheartening. What if I get to that assessment and they say 'you've gotten on the wrong horse, have you considered an ASD assessment?'
Has anyone here paid for a reassessment with any success? Would it just be more fruitful for me to go for an ADHD assessment and call it quits with ASD? The most important thing to me, really, is the personal clarity of a diagnosis. I feel so strongly that both apply to me, but I'm willing to just 'self-identify' and keep using the tools I've found helpful for ASD if push comes to shove, but I do ultimately feel like my outcome is incorrect... ): Any support is welcomed with open arms, as I have been struggling a lot with this.
