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Dating is so hard for Autistic people

AmyLR94

Why is it so hard to find someone genuine when it comes to dating Pensive.

I thought I would take the big step and join Tinder (again) and FB dating (again). Today I was speaking to someone on FB and he sounded nice and genuine, but something was off and he kept calling me babe and baby with kisses. Then he said he was thinking of be all day and then when I said if he could hold back from calling me baby and babe as I don’t know him that well, he deactivates he account after sending me a message saying “Take Care, your not the lady for me” *sighs*

I feel like I should just stay single and alone Pensive, it’s so hard to find someone.

I just want to feel loved and do all those couple things that everyone does SobSob x

UPDATE: Thank you to the people who have commented so far Relaxed️. I have deleted Tinder and FB Dating. I don’t think Dating apps are for me as I find it so hard to understand if someone is being genuine or just messing with my feelings.

I turned 30 this year so I wanted to actually find someone who would like me the way I am *sighs* but it’s difficult to find anyone genuine these days. Looks like I will be alone with pets for the rest of my life. 

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  • Even neurotypical people struggle with online dating as there's an awful lot of time wasters and game players out there. The man you were speaking to seems like one of these types. Way too fast and giving red flags all over the place. You did the right thing in stating your boundaries early and luckily he gave up and didn't try anything dodgy afterwards. Women on dating apps have to be so careful as there's a lot of men out there who have no understanding of consent, boundaries or respect. It's far too transactional and it's assumed that everything has to end in sex, so getting out of that can be very problematic.

    I couldn't use dating apps anymore and haven't for a while. Many of them seem to be used as hook up sites and aren't the place to find long lasting respectful relationships. I'm happily partnered at the moment but if I ever found myself single again I wouldn't be using a dating app. It all feels really false, shallow and superficial. I would be putting my neurostatus on my profile as a filter and even though it would most likely get me less interest, it would more likely attract people who understand me better. Quality over quantity. To be honest though if I got no replies it would do nothing for my self esteem so it's just asking for trouble.

    Pets and plants are better anyway.

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  • Even neurotypical people struggle with online dating as there's an awful lot of time wasters and game players out there. The man you were speaking to seems like one of these types. Way too fast and giving red flags all over the place. You did the right thing in stating your boundaries early and luckily he gave up and didn't try anything dodgy afterwards. Women on dating apps have to be so careful as there's a lot of men out there who have no understanding of consent, boundaries or respect. It's far too transactional and it's assumed that everything has to end in sex, so getting out of that can be very problematic.

    I couldn't use dating apps anymore and haven't for a while. Many of them seem to be used as hook up sites and aren't the place to find long lasting respectful relationships. I'm happily partnered at the moment but if I ever found myself single again I wouldn't be using a dating app. It all feels really false, shallow and superficial. I would be putting my neurostatus on my profile as a filter and even though it would most likely get me less interest, it would more likely attract people who understand me better. Quality over quantity. To be honest though if I got no replies it would do nothing for my self esteem so it's just asking for trouble.

    Pets and plants are better anyway.

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