I have ADHD and autism in case that’s relevant to the following - I was wondering about other peoples experience with daily stress and how their typical levels are during the course of a day. I write because I find it difficult to deal with and trust myself and how able I’ll be for any given day.
Typically I will wake up pretty early and very stressed. The thoughts of the day seem pretty overwhelming and I worry about not being able to even get out of bed and do the tasks needed to get the kids up and out. I try and get back to sleep or occupy myself with puzzles etc but it rarely pacifies. When it’s time to get up it goes one of two ways, I gradually tick off jobs I was worried about and it gets easier or I get more and more overwhelmed and it leads to anxiety becoming out of control and me needing to escape for a bit.
Typically during the course of the day, things will get gradually easier as I apply myself to work and then ramp up again in the evening where I have to cook for us all and help with bedtime for the kids.
Here’s where is gets interesting though, once the kids are in bed and I’ve completed what I’ve set out to do, my evenings are so less stressful; to the point where I feel like a different person. I have only just been diagnosed and 40 years of confusing anxiety has taken its toll on what I feel able to do. However, in the evenings I feel reasonably confident and feel like tomorrow will be easier. But when tomorrow does roll around, I wake up in the same way feeling like a shadow of last nights guy, barely able to put on my socks without having a crisis about it!
I find this cycle very frustrating and it really messes up the trust I have with myself. Am I evening guy, who feels ok to agree to activities and new experiences or am I morning guy who wants to cry into his red berry shredded wheats…
I wondered if anyone else had this sort of frustrating big day reset where despite your achievements of a day, the stress returns the very next day regardless.