Published on 12, July, 2020
This is one I struggle with. I find it hard to do things differently when situations change. I tend to get very anxious and insecure ; think I'm not able to cope. That I'll get things wrong. To a certain degree it increases my tendency to catastrophise.
As the saying goes, fail to plan is planning to fail.
I'm constantly running the "what if" scenarios and it's exhausting but somewhat necessary as I'm seldom caught out.
Generally minor things don't result in the end of the world.
Hergé said:Generally minor things don't result in the end of the world.
LOL! You've hit on a trigger phrase within my relationship! :)
When, due to my inflexible thinking, I react to issues or situations, I'm often told "it's not the end of the world", "would it be the end of the world?", etc.
In those moments, those responses only serve to make me feel a lot worse, because I don't feel that I'm being heard properly. Or understood, in the sense that - given my mental hardwiring - I can't help that the situation or issue feels very bad to me.
Of course, you - like my partner - are entirely correct. But that doesn't make any given situation feel any less frustrating or upsetting to me, or that response helpful in that moment.
Thinking about it now, that's perhaps not only because it feels instantly dismissive, but also because it underlines one of my "deficits", which makes me feel worse about myself.
This absolutely isn't meant as criticism of your comment. For me, it's factual, accurate, and helpful. And I agree with it - but only in this kind of objective, analytical context! :)
Quite a lot of things don't end the world literally I think that phrase is meant to be interpreted as making you see things from a different perspective. I'll also think of all the bad things that could happen if a situation affects me, but I'll also comfort someone else in the exact same situation and think nothing of it. Being stuck in your own head isn't helpful, so an outsider point of view is needed.
I also don't like changing situations, especially rapid changes. The problem is I've learned that the world does not adapt to me, I must adapt to the world. I could grumble about a lot of things, but at the end of it I would still be stuck at the same point as before. So while I'm never happy in those cases, I eventually push through it (not always comfortably) and find out that "it wasn't so bad" after all.