Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone, my name is steffan and I’m a 31 year old male with 2 children a 12 year old boy and a 4 year old girl (who are both on the pathway for autism also) also I have been diagnosed with EUPD (emotionally unstable personality disorder) along with severe anxiety suspected OCD and depression.
i am struggling massively in possibly every single aspect of my life and have been since i was a child. I have had my first contact video assessment and been told I have a huge amount of indications that I am autistic and have adhd. I have been placed on the full diagnostic assessment waiting list and have been told I could be waiting a long time, so I am feeling very deflated, isolated and alone and I also have a huge amount of anxiety bubbling away inside which I think won’t pass until my assessment is completed. Now I have been told by 7 different mental health workers that they believe I’m autistic and I really want to meet other people that are in my situation or experienced similar and could maby help me with some advice about what I could do to help and anything about support and finding a community I can join and feel like I belong as I feel so alone :( I suffer with panic attacks regularly and I can become very distressed in heavily crowded areas or if my mind runs away to fast with problems or worries I have (maby partly due to adhd) I just don’t understand the neurodevelopmental issue i have and am trying to reach out now. I just wish sometimes I could find friends easily or keep those friendships.
Welcome to the community, Steffan.
I was diagnosed as autistic last year, aged 41, and with ADHD a few months ago. I try to take each day as it comes, as cliched as that may sound. I'm so used to anxiety and depression, but I have to keep reminding myself that these are not permanent states. I find that special interests and the autism community help to regulate my mood.
Keep reaching out for support and answers - that's what we're here for.
Hello and thank you for welcoming me and sharing with me :)
that is a good way of looking at it, I’ve been dealing with anxiety and depression since I was 9 years old but found gaming would help soothe and give me something to focus on other than the issue at the time whatever it may be. I’m very new to this and am still questioning myself and doubting myself etc, I sort of obsess over everything, it’s one of my issues. I’m glad I’ve found this community though as I will be able to read what other people like me are feeling and thinking, reacting etc. thanks again for welcoming me.
I'm extremely good at obsessing over things - can be a bad thing (rumination) and a good thing (hyperfocus).
If it hadn't been for the online autistic community, I would never have realised I'm autistic and would have spent the rest of my life thinking I'm a broken version of a 'normal' person. An autism diagnosis/self-recognition is acceptance & permission to be different.